For Love

for love -------- home from church again a few minutes went by before my first sin sometimes i cry a cigarette, the breath of death to console a lonely heart i guess at least it isn't meth but it might be a start the love of Jesus gives me hope to try again to find a friend my chest hurts, it's hard to cope sometimes i seek the end i want to live, though yet not alone throughout sometimes i just go seeking who or what i'm all about maybe to another state far from here to be someplace i know and love or a place i've never been, it's clear i'm living here, but thinking above i sometimes fear that i will never find the place where i was meant to be a place with people, yet peace of mind people to care for, yet still to be free i found in God a cure for hopelessness in Jesus a ration of passion i thought back then that He would bless like of olden days, in Biblical fashion yet here i am alone at home and there everybody went, with me without my thoughts and hopes are chrome still spotted with rust colored doubt that i will ever have a Christian friend whose friendship is actual, not implied whose time he would happily spend with a weakling who broke down and cried for love