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Feelings of Nostalgia

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The soft breeze whispered in a barely heard whiff. Emptiness enveloped the lovely old park Past life has been hard and now all are dead stiff. Hot tears rolled down my cheeks as day became dark. Emptiness enveloped the lovely old park All six played around the opposing benches Hot tears rolled down my cheeks as day became dark. Young girls dreamed of becoming famous wenches All six played around the opposing benches Memories tumbled haphazardly in mind. Young girls dreamed of becoming famous wenches Knew instinctively we were loving and kind Memories tumbled haphazardly in mind. Not easy to forget those difficult years Knew instinctively we were loving and kind Recall all we said echoing in my ears Not easy to forget those difficult years Life had its plans for us as each departed Recall all we said echoing in my ears The lonely park we became broken-hearted Life had its plans for us as each departed Past life has been hard and now all are dead stiff. The lonely park we became broken-hearted The soft breeze whispered in a barely heard whiff. FICTION

Copyright © | Year Posted 2024




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Date: 2/22/2024 10:26:00 AM
Almost haunting- I love this form, and you nailed it!!
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Date: 2/16/2024 9:32:00 AM
A deep Pantoum. We must savor those memories, they certainly don’t come around too often, when they do it may be devastating or a romantic memory, still we have them. You have described the devastation of loneliness and at dusk, in the stillness of a park's atmosphere, so well done. Intriguing!
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Date: 2/16/2024 5:03:00 AM
A deep feeling Pantoum! Wonderful!
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Date: 2/14/2024 4:25:00 PM
Great imagery and deep feelings Those years do echo in our ears and also in our hearts. Hugs my friend
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Date: 2/14/2024 4:01:00 PM
a poignant nostalgic poem that spoke of the sadness and heartbreak that comes with losing friends and love-ones. Valentine's Day brings up all those memories, almost in a rush all at once. I found your poem gut wrenching and honest...a wonderful read. Have a pleasant evening, Sara
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Date: 2/14/2024 12:11:00 PM
Dear Victor, such a touching poem that draws the reader in. Beautifully written as always from your talented pen. The refrain lines really have an impact. You really can sense the loneliness with the reminiscence of past days. This is another new form to me and you have inspired me with this wonderfully constructed pantoum. Emotive read. Hugs and blessings to you.
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Date: 2/14/2024 9:36:00 AM
Exquisitely crafted and eloquently expressed, Victor's poignant narrative evokes a profound sense of heartache. It is as if a surge of cherished reminiscences of departed loved ones overwhelms our hearts, particularly when we witness the vibrant festivities of others' existence.
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Date: 2/14/2024 4:06:00 AM
Life can be difficult, and it's never easy when we lose those we care about. Though departed, it's important to remember the love and memories that were shared. It's understandable to feel broken-hearted, especially in a lonely place like a park. But know that you are not alone. The soft breeze whispers words of comfort, reminding us that one can find solace in even the smallest moments of peace. A wonderful Pantoum, dear Victor...Hugs
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Date: 2/14/2024 3:06:00 AM
This is so heart wrenching . Memories of departed dear ones rise in our hearts like tidal waves, especially when we see others enjoying the gala of life. Our loneliness is felt more in a place where one has been in the company of the loved one before. May God console you, dear Victor. Sending you love and hugs!
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Date: 2/14/2024 1:50:00 AM
- A heartbreaking poem with feelings... excellently written, Victor - hugs
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Date: 2/13/2024 2:30:00 PM
Memories etched with grief, heartbreak and loneliness, are so well conveyed in this well imagined tale, Victor. This is a fave for me.
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Date: 2/13/2024 2:27:00 PM
These are not so easy to write but you have done well. Thanks for sharing it with us and for dropping by my page. Sara K
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Date: 2/13/2024 2:05:00 PM
A good job on writing the difficult pantomime. The story returns to the lonely park, which I think keeps it relevant. I liked this poem.
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Date: 2/13/2024 12:50:00 PM
Feelings wonderfully woven in this write, resonating in memories. A FAVE from me, Victor--how expertly you scripted this verse in memoirs of past---Emptiness enveloped the lovely old park--Hot tears rolled down my cheeks as day became dark--And so much more that grabs the reader!
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Date: 2/13/2024 11:33:00 AM
An excellent pantoum in form, but also a deep and emotive poem that many will relate to.. You wrote this one really well...
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Date: 2/13/2024 10:22:00 AM
A plaintive pantoum, Victor, filled with memories of life in the past, memories that hold onto something precious in yesterday. Strong, bold images that carry us into your nostalgia! Wonderfully written. Blessings to you!
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Date: 2/13/2024 9:02:00 AM
A wonderful fictional Pantoum of nostalgia Victor. It must be lonely in a park after dark for those who’re departed and broken hearted. Beryl x
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Book: Shattered Sighs