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Fatherless Child

There once was a day I would watch every airplane.
Praying you was on it to come take me away.
As a child I wanted you around until the day, you actually came.
The day you came is the day my life forever changed.
I remember as if it was yesterday when you physically violated me.
Mental visions as early as the age of eight, but old enough to vociferate.
Visualizing mental pictures in my mind while I am awake very aware of the improper abuse I take.
Your body on me feels something like an autopsy of a dead body.
While you lay on top of me as you press aggressively on me.
Against my will your force kept me still.
I am trying to understand if you recognize who I am.
I try to say no hoping you can comprehend; I am weakling as you apprehend.
Mentally and physically I became involuntarily your property. 
A main character in a horror story, and you were my predatory.
I asked “God why?” as I bare to stare into his eyes.
This is not thee love I seek; all I wanted was my father to love me, but not like this injustice of violation of my rights.
This love is not real; not the love I wished to feel.
As he tries to stick his tongue into my mouth too young to know what this is all about.
I grip my lips painfully tight as he tries to slip his tongue inside.
I close them tighter with all my might, as he whispers, “let me love you right” 
I beg him to leave as he pried my legs open with his knees my insides scream “somebody please help me!”
As he whispers how much he loves me I’m praying for God to just kill me.
I rather be dead then a man’s punching bag.
As I lay there my body was dead, and I laid my soul to rest.
I looked around the room and seen the Old Spice on the desk the same fragrance he wore around his neck.
The sun began to rise as he began to close my thighs.
In that moment in time I had made up my mind any man that ever say they love me was just telling lies.
I learned the hard way that love does not kill your inside; love does not take your pride.
A fatherless child I shall forever reside.
Every day that passes that little eight-year-old girl dies slowly inside.
Asking Jesus,” Why permit this?” and he slowly whispers…as I gently whimpers, “faith is the light that guide you through the darkness, my words reflecting as a lamp unto my feet.”
“Walk unto my path I’m here to carry the weak, come into me you are weary and overburdened. I will carry the pain you have obtained.”
“I am your father and you are my child you are never fatherless because I’m always around.”

Copyright © | Year Posted 2012

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Date: 12/26/2014 11:52:00 PM
TWANNA, Congratulations -- This is a great way to end and start the new year, having your poem featured on the soups front page. Hope your Christmas was a merry one! Always & Forever ~LINDA~
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Date: 12/24/2014 8:01:00 PM
I can feel the story inside of you I can feel what your going through
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twanna Irisha
Date: 12/26/2014 5:14:00 PM
Thank you for taking time to read my poem. Greatly appreciated.
Date: 6/25/2012 8:09:00 AM
wow,love love, love this,great write Twanna
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twanna Irisha
Date: 6/25/2012 9:22:00 AM
Wow!..thank you Richard...thank you...your gonna make me cry.
Date: 6/23/2012 11:41:00 AM
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Date: 6/18/2012 12:33:00 PM
so heart wrenching. I can totally empathize with this. my father was the same kind of bastard! if you ever need a shoulder to lean on, send me a message and I will listen!
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twanna Irisha
Date: 6/19/2012 12:37:00 AM
Thank you Lisa, that's very kind of you to offer...<3
Date: 6/18/2012 11:44:00 AM
Speechless...POWERFUL, INTENSE, and HEARTFELT..and the images here!! I'm so sorry if this was wrote your heart out on this one!!!! regards..INK-U-SCRIPT
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twanna Irisha
Date: 6/18/2012 11:57:00 AM
Thank you Pace...I had to take some lines out of this poem it just wouldn't all fit....once my heart gets going it's kinda hard to stop writting.