Entropy

I want someone to snuggle under a blanket with, to watch TV, or for fingers to run softly through my hair while I read, my head in their lap. I want someone to kiss me goodnight. And good morning. Go to work. Pay the bills. Buy me a gift—just because. But phones ring, and doors knock, and emails chime. Kids scream, and I scream, Ice cream, Trucks rumble down the street. In our marriage, our family, our life, the closer the walls, the closer the chaos. Closed minds, closed doors. No trips to Bermuda. No money. No second honeymoon. No plan for college, retirement, or anything in between. No savings. Just spendings. Lending but no tithing. Smaller spaces, disordered chaos. Smaller spaces in my head. Entropy overtakes me.