Endless conflicts

I'm torn between two distant worlds ~ one steeped in wickedness and sin, the other pure and righteous; my mind drifts like oil on water. Alluring is the glory of heaven, promised if I remain pure and holy, yet enticing is the frivolity hidden in jollity they call "sin." My mind imagines the afterlife the Bible depicts, yet I savour worldly pleasures my flesh can't resist. Even when I long to retreat from every sinful street, my soul burns within with these endless conflicts. What if the promise is merely a myth, and I found out that piety robbed me of earthly pity? Would that not be a loss of two cities – one paved with gold, the other left cold?