Dust

Dust yawns in a forgotten corner knowing the lazy hand will never disturb its slumber. Flies flit in and out spiders weave their geometric wonders and wait. Dust wanders aimlessly in the afternoon haze neglect brings a deathly serenity. Dust's drowsy dance dithers in forlorn insignificance. A shrine of dust locks away memories of the past as dreams decay in suffocating silence. Written on 3/21/2017

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Anthony Mark

Date: 6/7/2017 5:21:00 AM

I don't see dust..I see death, and a passing of no significance, some things fall and remain broken,...I like the shrine reference, adds a good visual, I DO NOT like theword "fairy" , it adds an enchanted feel where none exists...for your poem ...remove that word now...and it will be a better write x Ian

Laura Leiser
Date: 6/7/2017 11:44:00 AM

Hi Ian, After reading it again and hearing your perspective, I do agree that the word "fairy" does not convey what I'm trying to portray with my take on "dust". Thanks for the constructive comments..they really help! Hope you are doing well. :)

Niall Fulham

Date: 5/11/2017 11:52:00 AM

Hi Laura , lovely write , I was looking for the hoover after reading :)) hugs from Ireland

Laura Leiser
Date: 5/11/2017 9:46:00 PM

Thanks, Liam. :)

John Michaels

Date: 4/14/2017 4:32:00 AM

Me again - back to offer congrats on your win!! Regards, John.

Laura Leiser
Date: 5/11/2017 9:46:00 PM

Thanks, John. :)

Jan Allison

Date: 3/29/2017 4:02:00 PM

love the personification in the first stanza - it made me yawn and feel sleepy lol fabulous imagery Laura congrats on your win:-) hugs Jan xx

Laura Leiser
Date: 5/11/2017 9:45:00 PM

Thanks, Jan. :)

John Hamilton

Date: 3/29/2017 10:06:00 AM

Nice write Laura, congratulations on a fine placement!

Laura Leiser
Date: 3/29/2017 2:23:00 PM

Thanks, John :)

Kai Michael Neumann

Date: 3/29/2017 2:49:00 AM

I like this. Wow, the suffocating silence of dust and the geometric wonders of the spiders. Congratulations. Am off to do same dusting my books, which will take a long time. Many wishes, Kai

Laura Leiser
Date: 3/29/2017 2:22:00 PM

Thanks, Kai! Glad you enjoyed my little poem :)