Dream Holiday Limericks

I check to see all that I need-- Some books and my favorite tweed-- Are all in their place, My snacks in their case, Now all I got to do is read. I was on a holiday with Fred “Let’s see who can pee farthest,” he said. Imagine my surprise When I opened my eyes To find that I had peed on my bed. I was at a beach with a friend Admiring how the ladies bend. Suddenly a fart, I woke with a start-- My nose against my dog’s butt end. I felt her hands putting some cream On me as I lay near a stream, Then, she’s on my head, I fell off the bed-- I woke to find all was a dream. It was a holiday indeed-- I went to places sans the need To get off the bed And fold the bedspread As I lay with my favorite read. November 1, 2024 Baguio City, Philippines