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Can you imagine my surprise When I woke up with thunder thighs I looked in my mirror and It gave me back a knowing grin Hard and heavy the diet days And all of my sweet tooth chocolate craves Knowing what's in front of me Makes this fat boy wanna scream So I check out the internet To find the perfect diet yet Lets see...... Urine injections from a pregnant babe That seems to be the latest craze How about this bubble wrap I just might be down with that Who is there to really say Which pill and how many I should take One that sympathizes with the way I feel While feeding me pint size starvation meals Here's one guaranteed to clean my clock While the next ten days I'm on the toilet docked This is funny...try and eat more sensibly That's like a foreign language to me Get your daily exercise Obviously written by some wise guy Goes to prove just what I've heard On the internet don't believe every word How about the Himalayan soft cheese wrap The secrets in the cheese to squeeze off the fat Or I could go the Hollywood way Have it sucked out and back to eating in one day There are so many options here It's hard to know which way to steer As my options all expand Think I'll just go buy elastic waist band pants And learn to enjoy in my own eyes The fact that I have thunder thighs

Copyright © | Year Posted 2016

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Date: 8/3/2016 10:45:00 AM
I'm getting a little fluffy in my old age but it's because I can no longer be active. I still eat the same things I have always eaten. But hell, I'm single, who cares? I'll bet I can still bench 250. Love the humor Mike. Just keep writing, please?
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Date: 8/3/2016 8:41:00 AM
Lol, this poem is a riot Mike! I personally don't suffer from "thunder thighs" but am getting batwings so have to do more arm curls!:)
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Mike Hauser
Date: 8/3/2016 8:50:00 AM
I'm not overweight myself but still tonk I could lose about 10's all in the mind!
Date: 8/3/2016 7:54:00 AM
Reading this makes me so glad I'm quite petite and have never been on a diet in my life lol:-) hugs Jan xx
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Mike Hauser
Date: 8/3/2016 8:24:00 AM
Here in America we ALL think we're fat! Hollywood has ruined us! Lol!