Get Your Premium Membership

Deciduous

Poet's Notes
(Show)

Become a Premium Member and post notes and photos about your poem like Susan Ashley.


September 7, 2024

~ Second Place ~
Contest: Deciduous
Sponsor: Craig Cornish

*Italian Sonnet
required rhyme scheme; abbaabba cdecde



 

My springtime blood did flow a river’s rush in stream bed’s cradle anchored to the land as dreams rode jet streams to the cirrus strand. I grew beneath the nimbus, thunder-lush but autumn’s dry-leaf-drought did bring a hush… though soul, a snowy owl, not stuck in sand, as slowly stilled my river came to stand — my thirst now nursed by rapture of the thrush. I muse about this skin and skins worn past, rebirth perhaps… a dolphin of the seas. This river turned a ripple wanes tonight surrender of what’s mortal… not the last. My sigh the sylph that finds the Pleiades — this breath I shed, a winter’s wisp of white.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2024




Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 10/28/2024 5:33:00 PM
Beautiful poetry Susan.
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 10/28/2024 6:06:00 PM
Dear David, thank you for your lovely comment. You are appreciated my poet friend. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
Date: 10/26/2024 11:27:00 AM
Another wonderful winning write from your gifted pen! Congratulations
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 10/28/2024 6:05:00 PM
Dear Karen, thank you for your wonderful words and kind congrats. Both are held in my truest appreciation. Warmest wishes my poet friend.. ~Susan
Date: 10/19/2024 8:26:00 PM
Italian sonnets are more challenging than English sonnets. Still you have come up with an excellent sonnet poem. I know the title is carefully chosen and I love it a lot. The seasonal shift from spring to autumn and then to winter is beautifully and effectively brought out through powerful images and metaphors. But nothing ends with winter. "I muse about this skin and skins worn past, rebirth perhaps… a dolphin of the seas." Love these lines that bring the hope of a rebirth. Here you have undertaken a cyclical journey from 'spring's rush of blood to autumn's dry leaf drought and then becoming a dolphin or a sylph that finds the Pleiades! What a wonderful journey. I drown in the depth of your verse. Congratulations on your great win dear poet maestro.
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 10/24/2024 7:53:00 AM
Dearest Valsa, inspiring friend and poet, I am truly touched and honored by the depths of your lovely comments. Indeed, "nothing ends with winter" as you so beautifully expressed. I believe the cycle lives on, as we see in Nature's seasons of life, death and rebirth. So it is, in my mind, with one's mind, body and soul. Even in a single lifetime, we have epiphanies that can be moments of spiritual or intellectual rebirth. After physical death, I believe the soul lives on and the opportunity exists for rebirth. I cherish your insights and your poetry friendship. Thank you for sharing in my poem and for sharing your precious thoughts with me. Warmest wishes my sweet and valued friend.. ~Susan
Date: 9/24/2024 11:29:00 AM
My Dearest Rhyme Time Friend, what a magnificent, metaphoric sonnet. Congratulations. Every line reinforces the sense of seasonal transition so much a part of fall until winter puts this world to sleep waiting for rebirth. "I muse about this skin and skins worn past," "this river turned a ripple wanes tonight," "autumn's dry leaf drought" truly your poetic signature shines brightly in these amazing images. So much to glean in the depths of your words, poetry sis. Abundant blessings to you!
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 10/14/2024 8:41:00 AM
My Dearest Rhyme Time Friend, I regret that our poetic paths have not crossed more frequently in recent times. I've only been here sporadically in the last months just due to life's busy-ness.. all good though :) Thank you for sharing your beautiful thoughts about my poem. I'm elated by your response and treasure your thoughts, my dear and revered poetry sis! You are ever inspiring and your words touch my heart deeply. Warmest wishes sent on high-flyin' cirrus strands.. ~Susan
Date: 9/21/2024 5:35:00 AM
Hello dear lovely Susan :-) Beautiful pure sonnet! Well enjoyed read! Have a wonderful day ~ AA
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/21/2024 7:21:00 PM
Dear Abdullah, my poet friend, thank you! It’s a delight to receive your gracious visit and inspiring comments. Warmest wishes dear poet.. ~Susan
Date: 9/18/2024 5:56:00 AM
Awesome take on the theme. Craig is picky, so you know this one's worthy of the high placement
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/20/2024 7:15:00 AM
Dear Tom, indeed, Craig is picky which always makes his contests so challenging, and through his contest challenges I have learned so much. Thank you for sharing in the emotions and imagery with me, your thoughtful response is uplifting. Warmest wishes my esteemed poet friend.. ~Suze
Date: 9/17/2024 3:46:00 PM
Very lovely. Well deserved win, Susan. Congrats
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/20/2024 7:12:00 AM
Dear Andrea, thank you for your heartwarming words and kind congrats. Both are held in my truest appreciation. Warmest wishes my poet friend.. ~Susan
Date: 9/16/2024 7:06:00 AM
Susan, I have been lost in your beautiful work this morning. This sonnet is stunning- your natural imagery and flawless meter reflect beautifully on this cyclical journey. Thank you for the inspiring read! Xo Jess
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/20/2024 7:11:00 AM
Dear Jess, I'm delighted to know your were lost in my poetry. It's thrilling to receive your precious thoughts, indeed, I hold them in my highest esteem as I so admire your golden pen and poetic gift. Thank you for sharing in the emotions and imagery of this poem with me. Warmest wishes my inspiring poet friend.. ~Susan
Date: 9/16/2024 1:17:00 AM
A beautiful poem fabulous sonnet so full of meaning and evocative phrases, congratulations
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/20/2024 7:01:00 AM
Dear Terry, my poet friend, thank you for sharing in the emotions and imagery of this poem with me. I'm so glad you enjoyed it. Your inspiring thoughts and kind congrats are truly appreciated. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
Date: 9/15/2024 7:45:00 PM
Masterful and so captivating ~ warmest congratulations on your podium win, Susan
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/20/2024 6:59:00 AM
Dear US, I'm filled with appreciation for your kind words and uplifting spirit. Your congrats are heartwarming, my poet friend. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
Date: 9/15/2024 5:20:00 AM
An eloquent description of the ebb and flow - so to speak - of the seasons, beautiful painted by an excellent wordsmith - All the best - I trust you will be able to add another trophy to your 'mantle piece' - Hugs Maria
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/20/2024 6:56:00 AM
Dearest Maria, my lovely poet friend, your presence here is a ray of sunshine that brightens my day. I am both humbled and honored by your moving and uplifting thoughts. Thank you for spending time with my poem and for sharing in the emotions and imagery with me. It's always a delight when our poetry paths cross, my sweet poetry sis. Warmest wishes and hugs.. ~Susan
Date: 9/14/2024 8:03:00 AM
Your vivid description of the change of seasons and rebirth is so unique, creative and inspiring, Susan! Such a thrill to read your seamless work! :)
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/14/2024 9:48:00 AM
Dear Laura, it's so wonderful to see you! It's a thrill to receive such beautiful comments from you. Indeed, I am both honored and humbled to receive your esteemed and uplifting thoughts. Thank you my lovely poet friend. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
Date: 9/14/2024 6:27:00 AM
Susan, i say my first reaction summed up in the word Eloquence. Clearly these lines speak of your true inner vision and voice regarding your vision and feeling about each season passing on to fall with the stated contrast accentuating this fall as it comes surrounding you. I love the title, admire you rhyming, too. Hugs, sally
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/14/2024 9:46:00 AM
Dear Sally, so grateful for our poetic paths crossing. Thank you for your beautiful and insightful comments. I learn just as much from receiving thoughtful responses to my work as I do from reading intriguing poetic works from other poets, like you dear soulful Sally! Your expressive poetic voice is truly appreciated here as it is on the glory of your own creative pages. Warmest wishes my poet friend.. ~Susan
Date: 9/9/2024 5:00:00 PM
I like how you've created a tour of seasons. It sounds like you enjoy all of them.
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/11/2024 11:34:00 AM
Dear Hilda, indeed! I live in New England and I adore all the seasons, especially Fall. Thank you for your gracious visit and kind comments. Warmest wishes my friend.. ~Susan
Date: 9/9/2024 1:17:00 PM
Dear susan, such a beautiful poem; i love this sonnet and how in a strict form too youv played around with words, painted imagery and and created something so sumptuous and worthy of all the accolades. I especially love the dolphin line, something about them always makes me happy! Iv been snorkelling with dolphins and its so healing and just magical! I love every woven in this! So very well polished! I especially love the lines “ but autumn’s-a snowy-slowly stilled my river came to stand” that stanza stood out for me, something about the way you’ve written truly made me feel alot and i must also highlight your seamless alliterations! Impeccable write! Best wishes! Im sure you will do well! Sending you light always talented soul!
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/11/2024 11:41:00 AM
Dear Ink, receiving your beautiful comments makes me as happy as swimming with dolphins!:) Your thoughts are just as magical too :)) Thank you for your uplifting words, they encourage me greatly and bring a smile to my being. It's wonderful to share an appreciation of poetry with you. Your creative poetry is always intriguing and exquisite with word choices and phrases that delight and surprise my imagination. Warmest wishes my artistic friend.. ~Susan
Date: 9/9/2024 11:34:00 AM
Your poetry is stark, vivid and engaging Susan, the way a true poem ought to be, perfection at its best !
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/10/2024 1:00:00 PM
Dear Rose, I am ever encouraged by your lovely comments. Thank you for sharing in the emotions and imagery of this poem with me. I'm so glad you enjoyed it. Your thoughts are truly appreciated, my poet friend. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
Date: 9/9/2024 4:47:00 AM
Rebirth and cycle of life is portrayed here in the most poetically beautiful and graceful way Susan! Your Italian Sonnet creates love thoughts to contemplate! I hope you've been well! Happy Monday!!!
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/10/2024 12:57:00 PM
Dear Mike, it's wonderful to see you! I've been doing well but have been away from the soup due to good kinds of busy-ness taking most of my free time. I hoping to have more time here going forward so I can get caught with reading lovely poetry from poet friends like you. Thank you for your insightful comments, they are truly appreciated. I hope all is well with you too :) Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
Date: 9/8/2024 9:06:00 PM
Life is so daily and then dusk comes with death on the menu. Dreaming done, we make the destined decision. At the start is it a steam bed or a stream bed? I can see both would be appropriate in their own light. Kudoes on your iambic pentameter - it is not easy for me.
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/10/2024 12:53:00 PM
Dear Reason, thank you for sharing in the emotions and imagery of this poem with me. I relish your thoughtful response to my verse and your kudoes for the IP. It took reading and composing many sonnets for me to feel comfortable with IP, and through practice I am ever learning. Your heartwarming kindness is truly appreciated. Warmest wishes my poet friend.. ~Susan
Date: 9/8/2024 5:23:00 PM
Susan, a tree developing and then losing its leaves has never been expressed so elegantly. The cycle each year seems remarkable and you bring it to life. I'm thinking about all the different motions and stages of leaves and it's making me smile.
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/10/2024 12:48:00 PM
Dear Duke, thank you for sharing in the emotions and imagery of this poem with me. Indeed, the cycles of Nature, the cycle of life and death is remarkable as Nature's wisdom is profound. I'm so happy to know that my verse provoked your thoughts and a smile. Warmest wishes my poet friend.. ~Susan
Date: 9/8/2024 12:50:00 PM
A seamless sonnet that flows so well and the meter seems spot on to me, not that i am an expert in the matter.. I think Craig will like this one..
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/10/2024 12:43:00 PM
Dear Silent One, thank you for your gracious visit and heartwarming comments. I'm so glad you enjoyed my poem. Your thoughts are truly appreciated, my friend. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
Date: 9/8/2024 12:00:00 PM
Susan, this is simply- amazing- what you did with an Italian Sonnet, wow! It leaves me in awe <3
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/8/2024 12:09:00 PM
Dear Paige, I honored and humbled by your response to my poem. Thank you for sharing your uplifting thoughts with me. Your poetic spirit is truly appreciated. Warmest wishes my poet friend.. ~Susan
Date: 9/7/2024 11:15:00 AM
Hello Susan, I love this poem. Dolphins are wonder4ful creatures. I only seen them in photos. Hugs. /Darlene./ Hugs. /Darlene/ my sweet friend.
Login to Reply
De Beaulieu Avatar
Darlene De Beaulieu
Date: 9/8/2024 11:45:00 AM
Hello Susan, I love the dolphins They always have a smile on their faces. yes i love this poem. I am pleased that I have brightened your day. You are welcome. Warm wishes. /Darlene/
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/7/2024 4:31:00 PM
Dear Darlene, I’m so glad you love this poem. I agree dolphins are wonderful creatures. Thank you for the delight of your visit. Your poetic spirit and beautiful comments brighten my day. Warmest wishes and hugs my sweet friend.. ~Susan
Date: 9/7/2024 10:42:00 AM
Ooh, she's after another trophy I suspect. And why not? When you're in your (writing) prime go for it. This is so awesome and I suspect the Craigster will agree. Have a great weekend Suze
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 9/7/2024 11:06:00 AM
Oh no no no… not going after a trophy here, just writing for a standard contest because of the challenge of the meter and the theme. I enjoyed addressing both. Thank you for your uplifting comments, dear Tom. Your visit is a delight! Have a nice weekend too :) Warmest wishes, my poet friend.. ~Suze

Book: Radiant Verses: A Journey Through Inspiring Poetry