Death's Door

I was born through that bloody door Through my mother’s womb, I saw the gloam I was once two, expelled as one I’m now on the flip side of the portal Into life, the door closed behind me I come back to what God denied I unlocked the door with attempts I still jiggle the lock pursued by suicide There are marks on that cold facade On the other side, I pulled to its face I know the contours of the living door Its surface magnifies my weariness Calls of loved ones have a gravity They like greater heavenly bodies Those beyond the gate are sirens Won't the knob stop beckoning? I gaze through the opaque peephole Hoping to see where I came from The door calls to me before my time I know the door like an old friend Only I lay mines on the doorstep Fight the urge to blast it open Shrapnels lead others to despair Keep them safe from mines The cold steel door lulls me I’ve got better things to do, death If I exit your bloody door Will I, at last, be no more? No door, no egress, no me The trinity united with the great thou A singularity of endings or nothing at all To exit as one with patience, God