Custard

Dad was digging in the garden When he struck a custard well Mum was none too happy By her phizog you could tell We watched the plume of custard As it rose into the sky Dad said “It’s bloomin’ lovely We can have that with some pie Mum was still unhappy “This has ruined my best dress You can both get out there later And clear up this ruddy mess” First thing in the morning I went out, to see the hole Scraped away the surface And I filled a little bowl Sitting on my haunches In my jim jams and a vest I took a cautious spoonful And declared it was the best Then later on, the press appeared And in the garden mustered As Dad explained how he had found A well of perfect custard A well known geolologist Was hired to survey He said our well, might just achieve Ten thousand puds a day So, Dad went out and bought himself A brand new custard pump And put it in the shed that he Was just about to dump With lots and lots of effort And a little bit of planning We built ourselves a factory And we started custard canning Now mum is very happy, ‘cause We’ve bought a house that’s bigger Don’t know what she’ll say though When she sees Dad’s bought a digger