Cowboys and Parrot

Two cowpokes stagger to the saloon Fighting because thems fighting words Over a red parrot blocking their path Pacing arrogantly before the bar entrance Flapping green wings and screeching The two men eventually find their way in Order up a bottle of whiskey Drink it down quickly and ask for another Both argue a matter dramatically clear Articulate philosophical words from the whiskey and beer One says the feathery creature outside is a bird The other says its a parrot B-I-R-D I says! says Jack, with a black patch over an eye PARROT! Screams back Sam because Sam's the man Judge Johnson interrupted the hombres Disturbed from his corner and sleep Lifting himself and his beard, heavy from drinking Figuring to intervene Jack screams at Sam, you're as dumb as a sack of dirt That thing, that BIRD outside has wings not fur It has a beak and eats seeds too you goof Sam yells back, That species is parrot you idiot! Judge Jonson jumps in, “It does not matter.” Then he collapsed. Table crashed…. The end one…. so that's that Jack and Sam step outside with drawn pistols One of them says one more time, “BIRD!” “You *****!” The other replies, “PARROT!” “You bastard!” They both gunned down the bird. No surprise And went back to drinking inside Being they was best buddies and all The parrot or bird ended up there at the top On the hill in the cemetery in lots a pieces May it rest in peace With a tombstone above its head The epitaph read; Here lies the dead bird Polly. It was a parrot. Had a terrible speech impediment It screeched and met its doom If it knew something about sobriety If it could have quacked or chirped quietly Stayed clear of bar flies and saloons Who knows But Bye bye birdie good-bye