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Covid Limericks

BIG FRANKIE.

A bank robber named Big Frankie Mulqueen
In the bank he walked armed and looking mean
An old dear took him to task
For not wearing a face mask 
Embarrassed he quickly ran from the scene... 

ROUGH RIDE.

This last year's been one helluva rough ride
Covid has been a pain in the backside
No sneezing or spitting
No hugging or kissing 
And it's affecting everyone worldwide... 

MAXINE.

There was an old women called Maxine
Last week she had the covid vaccine
But when she woke up in bed 
Found she'd grown another head
And her hands and her feet had turned green... 

CHINA BEWARE.

If you're travelling to China beware
To test for covid your bottom is bare
You'll sure shed a tear
When they probe your rear
Just ensure your wearing clean underwear...




 
 Written 25th May 2021

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Indiana Shaw

Date: 12/13/2021 8:36:00 PM

You have not lost your touch Tom, when it comes to your limericks, hilarity in times of diversity is the tonic we all need in the lead up to Christmas, you never cease to fail us . . . : )

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/13/2021 9:25:00 PM

Thank you very much Indiana, im happy that you enjoyed them. I hope you are keeping well. Tom

Marikate Kingston

Date: 12/8/2021 5:17:00 PM

This poem was funny and it made me smile:-) My favorite limerick is titled, Rough Ride. I am new to your poetry and enjoying each one so.

Tom Cunningham
Date: 12/8/2021 11:26:00 PM

Thank you very much Marikate, im happy you enjoyed the humour. Belated welcome to poetry soup. Tom

Natasha L Scragg

Date: 7/14/2021 1:05:00 PM

Ha ha!! These are halarious! My fave is rough ride.... Loooove your sense of humour.

Tom Cunningham
Date: 7/14/2021 1:14:00 PM

Thank you very much Natasha, im pleased that you enjoyed them. Tom

Liz Archer

Date: 7/11/2021 2:50:00 AM

Very amusing! Love it! :D

Tom Cunningham
Date: 7/11/2021 3:51:00 AM

Thank you Liz, happy you enjoyed them. Tom

Brian Sambourne

Date: 6/26/2021 4:34:00 PM

Superb, Tom! You are in fine comedic form with these clever limericks. My favorite remains "China Beware" but each one is a winner. Still chuckling. Be well. Brian

Tom Cunningham
Date: 6/26/2021 11:47:00 PM

Thank you very much Brian, im happy you enjoyed the humour, China's definitely off my bucket list lol. Tom

Jack Horne

Date: 6/4/2021 2:35:00 PM

LOL, hilarious - especially the last one. Loved your limericks with Jan too (I read them on her page & left a comment for you both). thanks very much for the kind message on my birthday blog - so sorry I've only just seen it

Tom Cunningham
Date: 6/4/2021 3:18:00 PM

Thank you very much Jack, im happy that you enjoyed them, that last one isn't fiction lol. It was a hoot collaborating with Jan, I hope you had a lovely birthday. Enjoy your weekend. Tom

Sara Kendrick

Date: 6/2/2021 3:46:00 AM

Creative humor to give a little laughter in our life. Thanks for the visit to my page. Sara

Tom Cunningham
Date: 6/2/2021 4:07:00 AM

Thank you very much Sara, glad you enjoyed the humour, it does help to take the edge off things. Tom

John Watt

Date: 6/1/2021 11:36:00 PM

Tom, thanks for the laughs (socially distanced, of course). It's cry or laugh, and I'd prefer the latter. Hope you're doing well, my friend.

Sara Kendrick
Date: 6/2/2021 3:46:00 AM

Been so bad days but a little humor helps us make it through. Sara

Tom Cunningham
Date: 6/2/2021 2:10:00 AM

Thank you very much John, I couldn't agree more, humour will always see us through. All good here and hope you are too. Tom

Heidi Sands

Date: 6/1/2021 3:41:00 PM

Tom, these are so creative and something we can all relate to. Thanks for sharing. Well done :)

Tom Cunningham
Date: 6/1/2021 3:52:00 PM

Thank you very much Heidi, im glad you enjoyed them. The last one isn't fiction lol. Tom

Lisa Ricci

Date: 6/1/2021 6:07:00 AM

Good Morning Tom. I turned the page to this because of its title. Yes we are all sick and tired of covid for certain. You brought light fun and play to covid and to what we worldwide have gone through and continue to go through. Truly. Each entry above describe it all but I very much liked "rough ride" with words of truth not that the others were not. Thank you for sharing your talent. Have a wonderful day and enjoy poetry soup.

Tom Cunningham
Date: 6/1/2021 3:53:00 PM

Thank you very much Lisa, im happy that you enjoyed the humour. Enjoy your week. Tom

Jack Ellison

Date: 5/31/2021 11:39:00 AM

Great fun my good man!! I particularly enjoyed Maxine and China Beware!!!!!!!!

Tom Cunningham
Date: 5/31/2021 12:20:00 PM

Thank you very much Jack, China's off my holiday list lol. Glad you liked them. Tom

Janice Canerdy

Date: 5/30/2021 7:41:00 PM

Thanks for the laughs, Tom! Janice

Tom Cunningham
Date: 5/31/2021 12:19:00 PM

Thank you very much Janice, im happy that you enjoyed them. Tom

Tony Hargreaves

Date: 5/30/2021 12:21:00 PM

Hi Tom. My favourite is Maxine. Brilliant and traditional Limerick style. Tony

Tom Cunningham
Date: 5/30/2021 12:23:00 PM

Thank you very much Tony, im pleased that you enjoyed them, hope you're enjoying the good weather, so overdue. Tom

Suzanne Delaney

Date: 5/29/2021 4:16:00 PM

These are so funny, Tom. You are a wonderful humorist. I can always depend on you for a good laugh. Best, SuZ

Tom Cunningham
Date: 5/29/2021 4:34:00 PM

Thank you very much Suz, im happy you enjoyed the humour. I hope you are well. Tom

Terry Flood

Date: 5/29/2021 3:18:00 PM

If you don’t laugh, you’ll cry. But trust in Cummings, I’ll try... NOT! We clearly enjoy alternative viewpoints re that snide of a rattlesnake, Cummings, but I do agree with everyone here... good fun filled limericks. Terry

Tom Cunningham
Date: 5/29/2021 4:33:00 PM

Thank you Terry, glad you enjoyed, Cummings is only lashing out after he left under a cloud a lot of hearsay but as yet no real proof. Heatwave on the way, enjoy your weekend. Tom

Kim Rodrigues

Date: 5/28/2021 4:08:00 PM

Speaking of the rough ride. Our family used the “birthday tomato” to blow out the candle...lol...no spitting on the cake this year!

Kim Rodrigues
Date: 5/29/2021 3:32:00 PM

LOL

Tom Cunningham
Date: 5/29/2021 1:32:00 AM

Thank you Kim, always a standing joke about kids spraying the candles out lol. Tom

Jennifer Proxenos

Date: 5/28/2021 9:52:00 AM

Both Elias and I enjoyed your limericks immensely. Well penned my friend, Keep well. Blessings Jenny.

Tom Cunningham
Date: 5/28/2021 10:53:00 AM

Thank you very much Jennifer, we were supposed to have restrictions lifted soon but the virus has other ideas. Im happy that you both enjoyed them. Tom

Lindsay Laurie

Date: 5/27/2021 5:02:00 PM

G'day Tom ... just when we thought it beaten, it roared back into life. Now we are going through our fourth lock down. Thanks for your limericks to put some humour up for me Tom - Lindsay

Tom Cunningham
Date: 5/28/2021 10:52:00 AM

Thank you very much Lindsay, its never ending like you say, now varients are hitting us, god only knows when things will be back to normal again so we might as well laugh about it. Tom

Eve Roper

Date: 5/26/2021 9:25:00 PM

So funny my friend, need a laugh. Hugs

Tom Cunningham
Date: 5/27/2021 1:20:00 AM

Thank you very much Eve, im happy that you enjoyed them. Tom

Rico Leffanta

Date: 5/26/2021 11:44:00 AM

Thanks for the laughs! Here is one for you: Hawai'i Governor Ige has just lifted the requirement for face masks to be worn outdoors so everyone can enjoy Memorial Day!

Tom Cunningham
Date: 5/26/2021 11:50:00 AM

Thank you Rico, glad you enjoyed them, good news for Hawaii, the first steps to normality. Tom