counting down the days

Look god I know there’s a way people usually pray to you But I don’t work that way So I’m gonna just say what I have to say I want to love you But you cant I struggle And I know there’s not excuses For the thing I’ve been doing And I’m not gonna stop But I’m still saying sorry But I guess it’s a worthless apology It’s hard to love you when your shoved in my face It’s a hard thing to take When your mother doesn’t love you Only enough to show you God But she doesn’t actually care She just what’s me to pray And praise for the rest of my days You ever heard of out staying your welcome You’ve been here for so long I’m counting the hours The hours till I’m out of this house I’ve been ready to leave for years now Looks pretty and yellow on the outside But really it’s filled with yelling and crying wishing I was dying lying I’ve been ready to leave for years now Me neither I don’t see much of her these days I feel bad because now that she’s older She’s gotta this bolder over her shoulder Of these kids she’s got to raise Counting down the days Hoping that when she leaves These little sweet kids don’t get treated this way I hope they have words Words that they can say At least Not my age anyways Breathing in all these religious fumes I’m suffocating No way of alleviating I have words I’m just not allowed to say But I will one day I’ll let all my words out I had to grow old at a young age I think it’s always been this way I don’t remember having fun with anyone Remember that little sweet Girl you raised?