Confession To Self

I’m lost for words and I can’t really understand why I have such strong feelings for this man. Never before have I smiled so much or even threw on a blush. But it’s something about this boy that I can’t apprehend. Why I feel this way is a mystification to me. My heart refuses to skip a beat. My feelings are overlapping and my mind is continuously racing. With thoughts of him being contested every day. My emotions becoming unbearably revealing with each moment I hear his voice. I don’t understand the emotions filled with adulation, affection, devotion, and enchantment. Not knowing what love is but thinking it’s there. I have substantial animosity that I feel I should share. Can he behold the infatuation that is there? Does he distinguish the sentiment that I hold? Why can’t I just announce the antagonism that is there? I don’t perceive the detachment between my feelings and my mouth. Why can’t I just extinguish them? Why don’t I let them out? I think I’m going to tell him but I don’t know what he’ll say. But my compassion wants me to let him know anyway. I’m not going to hold it in anymore because if he cares he will surely understand. Even if he doesn’t I have to reveal this because it’s what my heart commands.