Cause the Difference

You would think i'd expect, nothing less than for this time to be any different, I waste my time in this world just wishing all the ways that maybe I didn't. Just when I think I finally see something good, it never comes from within them. And then the wind blows by me, whispers to me how I should've just listened.. Still sitting here, with no one near and all I fear is the greatest indifference. All they ever did for me, was remind me just how much I missed him. But now the missed is past tense because right now I no longer miss him.. Oh how I cried, wanted to die, the reasons why I couldn't still kiss him. Ill digress from the world, find a new ways and a place where I can stay hidden. Because now I've lost all thought, and forgot how to sit and enjoy the forbidden. The only words I can find to make sense of right now would be the two words: good riddence. Cause every place that I loved is now a place I must understand as forbidden. Can't find a home to call my own cause each one I've known is just way too different. They say "just go find a job" & tell me how I should never miss him. But none ever gave reason to stop, make me stay, just sit down and listen. They have me convinced I must pay for the words that they've never written. As if they are the teachers in that class I never passed or was smart enough to sit in. So is it me or is it you that will make the right move to make the change that will cause a real difference? Because in the end, all this **** was meant to be, between you and me, never them, But we both let them all listen.