Catty Schism

In the Catholic Schools of the West
All students are put to a test
Their head must go South
With an open mouth
To measure who comes off the best

A priest is never too fickle
An Adam's Apple to tickle
No need to repent
Its all Heaven-sent
The meek love sucking a pickle

Virile men should become a priest
So many are needed back East
Beneath every frock
Likes a ticking clock
Hungry mouths in need of a feast

The Bible predicts that a beast
Will plunder the Great and the Least
So you can do more
To even the score
When you serve this world as a priest!
Copyright © | Year Posted 2019

Poem

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Peck Avatar
November 5, 2021 at 3:46 PM
Finally reading this. I wish a priest would read this. Maybe the Pope - why not! A sad thing is, they think they have the right to ruin someone's life. Good for you, Rico!
Leffanta Avatar
November 6, 2021 at 10:26 AM
Can the Pope can read? Inn Genesis 2:7, God says life does NOT begin before the breath of life is inhaled through the nostrils, and in Matthew 18:9 instructs, "If thine eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee" so clearly God does NOT see any crime nor sin in abortion, yet the Pope does, so either the Pope can't read, or does not believe the scriptures are the Word of God, or thinks he knows better than God what is best for humanity!
Gibson Avatar
March 3, 2021 at 4:13 PM
"a ticking clock" very funny...
Kaufman Avatar
February 16, 2020 at 10:25 AM
very witty and well done..one of my earlier jobs was for a treatment program in the 80's for priests and nuns..Mostly the nuns took care of their own..very sad situation there..
De Beaulieu Avatar
March 9, 2019 at 1:32 PM
Hello Rico, oh yes the Catholic Church has many problems, that i think will not be resolved. I think that the prist should marry so no nonsense willbe done that shouldn't. be done. have a nice day my friend.
Leffanta Avatar
March 13, 2019 at 1:08 PM
Thank you for reading and commenting! Aloha! Rico
Laurie Avatar
March 1, 2019 at 12:40 AM
G'day Rico … the Catholic Church has a problem here right now with a Cardinal found guilty of child abuse. It's all over the news and more - ouch! Lindsay
Leffanta Avatar
March 3, 2019 at 2:37 PM
The truly sad part is that such conduct is not limited to Catholic priests but is common among alleged religious leaders! Thanks for reading, mate! Aloha, Rico
Allison Avatar
February 28, 2019 at 7:04 PM
OMG OMG OMG got to be POTD lol so darn funny Rico am adding this hilarious gem to my faves and the title is poetic genius!:-) hugs Jan xx
Leffanta Avatar
March 2, 2019 at 7:32 PM
Not even close, but mahalo for the kind words and wishes! Aloha! Rico
Devonshire Avatar
February 27, 2019 at 9:33 PM
Bless me, Father Leffanta, for I have sinned. I dared to laugh reading this hilarious poem -- which deep down has some serious meaning. Great work, Rico! A fave for me. Blessings from Sister Carolyn
Leffanta Avatar
February 28, 2019 at 6:33 PM
Mahalo! I hope it will do some good. Sex is a prime motivator, so I thought, "Why would a Jihadist blow himself - and others - to smithereens to earn a virgin in heaven when he could become a priest and enjoy any number of virgins in the flesh?" Aloha! Rico
Faulkner Avatar
February 27, 2019 at 7:44 PM
Biting and brilliant, Rico, excellent write!
Leffanta Avatar
February 28, 2019 at 6:33 PM
Mahalo, Michelle! Aloha! Rico
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