Get Your Premium Membership

Broken

Poet's Notes
(Show)

Become a Premium Member and post notes and photos about your poem like Frederic Parker.


contest Beautiful or Broken words

sponsor Constance La France

I replay the cold goodbye in my mind spoken in harsh tones from the same lips that once said "I love you" over and over in a relentless circle causing all the stars to vanish as the night becomes blacker than black tendrils of slithering loneliness wrap around my heart suffocating me with pain-filled emotions as they die one layer at a time drowning my soul in teardrops of madness long streams from raw eyes turn my face into a wetter canvas it burns and burns my hearts shattered shards are covered in ashes that cling I fall, pounding my fists into the ground crying out in this world of darkness nothing exists the only sound I hear is my own gasps welling up in my chest, releasing into the void where I surrender to the longest night filled with pain

Copyright © | Year Posted 2023




Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 9/11/2023 9:08:00 PM
So emotional, loved how you have described the heartache and it is truly a lovely poem.
Login to Reply
Date: 9/10/2023 11:59:00 PM
Frederic, excellent poem and congratulations on your win in my contest, love the image and music, Constance
Login to Reply
Date: 8/27/2023 8:09:00 PM
I love this write Frederic, you evoke such raw emotion and it is a sure winner.
Login to Reply
Date: 8/26/2023 9:31:00 PM
"your prolonged caress..." - Beautiful writing. Congratulations!
Login to Reply
Date: 8/25/2023 8:16:00 AM
Gosh- I need tissues! I read this aloud whilst the music was playing in the background pausing with the sad, dramatic music. My goodness Frederic- it grabbed my tender, vulnerable heart too. Your profound words are so achingly beautiful, so relatable to so many. Perfect lyrics for a perfect instrumental piece. Thank you Frederic - this is a favourite and I am now lost for words …….
Login to Reply
Date: 8/24/2023 9:05:00 PM
Beautifully written with a string of heartache to pull our nerve of emotions. And how sad it is that we can relate at times of heartache… My best to you Frederic :)
Login to Reply
Date: 8/24/2023 3:22:00 AM
I can definitely relate so much with this piece, it spoke to my vulnerable heart. Such evocative emotions have been carved here in between the lines, conveying the intended poignant emotions.. "I replay the cold goodbye in my mind spoken in harsh tunes, from the same lips that once said " I love you"" Ahh, that pulled some very deep and gloomy heartstrings.. A brilliantly heart-aching piece.. Love this!
Login to Reply
Date: 8/23/2023 11:21:00 PM
So much angst and pain so poetically depicted . I think many can resonate with these words, as at some point in our life we all have had to deal with such bitter goodbyes. Its sad when that happens and i love the creative way youve expressed that . “The only sound i hear is my own gasps” that really is soul hitting! Poignant and heart rendering writ! I felt so much reading this
Login to Reply
Date: 8/23/2023 12:47:00 PM
... this was very sad, Frederic ... a deep emotional pain ... excellent written - Best wishes in the contest :) - hugs
Login to Reply
Date: 8/23/2023 2:17:00 AM
Sad words from a broken heart Frederic, true or fictional you said it well… Belle
Login to Reply
Date: 8/22/2023 2:20:00 PM
A broken heart's pain, though not physical, is more painful than any corporeal pain. Not many poets on site can relate that depth of pain as you do, Frederic. A nod to your talent. "Cold" accompaniment is perfect to reflect such aching.
Login to Reply

Book: Reflection on the Important Things