Breathe

“Breathe” Is that agony I feel, mixed with a little bit of defeat? Speaking the words that seem to flow from your lips like water from a broken main… “breathe”. What do you think I have been doing for the past 24 hours? Your words bring no comfort and there is NOTHING your mother could say to make me believe this too shall pass. I just pace and wait and pace and wait but still my soul feels like it is being stripped from my body. I understand big picture and oh yes, the best is yet to come but I can’t help but feel like it is only me on an island by myself. I watch the sun as it makes its descent into the evening sky and it brings me no solace. Your claims of always being there for me and never leaving my side seem to fall on deaf ears as I fade into a pain that the strongest medication could not touch. “Breathe” you continue to say it will all be ok and for the first time in 24 hours I listen. My fate has been sealed and I have no choice but to push through the most difficult part of this journey. I close my eyes to pray because only god can help me get through this. I continue to “breathe” and the last exhale I feel the weight of the world lifted off of my shoulders. As the doctor leans over I hear a whisper of “nineseventeenPM” and at that point I know that life has just begun.