Breaking Down

I've tried many times To not cut, To not fall into teptations you single handliy abolished whatever piece of my heart was left you see the struggles i've been through but you still leave me like i'm nothing I'm sorry for existing I'm sorry for loving you I'm sorry for having you to love me I'm sorry for all the struggles I've put you through But what i'm most sorry for is wasting your time I'm sorry that i can't live up to expectations I'm sorry i broke down I tried to hold out, To be strong, but i physically and mentally can't I'm sorry i can't be the ideal perfect girl everybody makes me out to seem I'm sorry you can see my scars but that's the only thing beautiful about me I've totally lost control Don't know where or how to start Don't know if i want to start , maybe i should just give up I cry too much , too many tears in only a short time I'm sorry I couldn't put on my fake smile, I just can't find it anymore However what I'm sorry for the most is affecting you and everbody I'm sorry for getting into your head and heart And once again I'm sorry for apologizing too much