Big Red
It was the "Old West" and the town dusty
When in on his horse came a galloper named Rusty.
He ran into the saloon and shouted aloud
"Big Red's a Comin'" ... which stunned the crowd.
They started to disappear as quick as they could
Big Red's reputation dictated they should.
So out the windows and out the doors
Like an open floodgate the men just poured.
The only one left was the fella who tended the bar
Too scared to move, he just stood thar.
Then, very slowly a huge figure came ridin' up the street
Ridin' a Buffalo, big boots and spurs on his feet.
He looked like a meanun' Big Six Guns at his side
He didn't use a saddle, to ride that Buffalo Hide.
He wore a sombrero to shade his eyes
The black scruff of a beard fit his face and his size.
He had bandoliers of bullets crossed o'er both shoulders
And he looked like with one hand he could move boulders.
He busted the doors off their hinges as he strode in
Walked up to the bar, where the barkeep wasn't movin'.
"Gimme a Whisky", he barked in his way
The barkeep couldn't move, or even a word did he say.
"I SAID GIMME A WHISKY" again came the bellow
As he grabbed the barkeep, a right dainty fellow.
Off the walls he bounced him and off the ceiling too
Then threw him back behind the bar for his work to get to.
The barkeep put up a bottle which he grasped in his paw
Broke the neck on the bar and guzzled its contents as the barkeep watched in awe.
He didn't stop drinkin' 'till the bottle was empty with whisky not a trace
Put his sleeve up to his mouth and wiped the drops off his face.
He belched once or twice as he looked around
Then turned to the barkeep when he heard the sound.
"D..d..do Y..y..you want a..another" asked the barkeep's frail voice
The Big Man looked at him as if there were no choice.
"No...I gotta be goin'", he said in dismay
"I heard that 'BIG RED' was headin' this way"!
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