Bag of Spiders

With a bag of spiders collected for my science project A fifth grader’s “Spiders Under The Influence” was the subject Got the idea from a book on the study by a zoologist Shifting the time when spiders built their webs, his quest The pattern of the orbs distorted, the greater the toxicity I knew from reading that they were safe so no need for pity They gave my mother valium (a tiny pill) for anxiety Although I always behaved with the utmost propriety I couldn’t say to her, I’m having a nervous breakdown mom I must pass a final to graduate, can I please have one? I waited until she dyed her hair, a beautician I applause I snuck into her bureau and swiped a pill for the cause The pot I stole from my older sister, stinky skunk weed I’d mash then extract, made it hash to put in the feed I had done the same with the pills and the caffeine I used sugar water as the solution and began graphing The results of the experiment a success, I felt like a celeb It takes one hour for a garden spider to build an orb web Small doses of these drugs showed the cobwebs were smaller They were way out of whack, droopy and irregular The radii uneven, the widespread of the circles was affected The sleepy one did nothing all day as expected The spider on marijuana started a web, then flat-out gave up It took the creepy crawler longer to string and linkup The spiders survived; I hurled them back into the bag In the garden I set them free as I watched them zig-zag Mrs. Byrd, my science teacher was very angry and refused to exhibit She gave me an A anyway whispered to me, enjoyed it quite a bit!