I am emotionally unstable,
From being wrapped in the clutching grips of this mental psychosis.
I am now vulnerable to the plague of self infliction,
driving me towards one of my many addictions.
Allow me to pick my own poisons and ravage my own mind to
Free me of those thoughts that begin with happiness
But unfortunately and all too frequently end in time.
These embarrassing and disgusting thoughts of my insecurity
Are only fueled by my minds certainty,
That the further I plummet into your egos vulnerability
I will be exhausted by your truth.
This is my reality.
My heart has been poisoned all while my mind has been victimized.
Taken for granted by your cold acknowledgments and yet still this insatiable need for you
In one word is Asinine.
My cancerous wounds being wrapped and saturated with your ointment,
Healed…By you simply calling my name.
I am fully aware of the consequences that will condemn me
By rekindling your flame.
The validity of my former understandings of right from wrong
Have taken a turn in a direction where the nights are long
And as the cold settles in my bones I pray for dawn,
where my hopes paint scenes of a past that’s not all gone.
See I know that with every ending starts with a new beginning
And I have sampled quite a portion of those fish in the sea
And believe me, I have no problem scooping up another fine dime piece
That would do almost anything to ride with me
But physical contact has its limitations
It’s was our mental aspect that inspired my aspirations
It was knowing that your rock was strong and
I could lean on you when I had been on my feet too long
But that is my issue…what I thought I knew was wrong.
So now I smash and shatter through this reality
Stuffy with head pressure like a bad case of seasonal allergies
A feeling of panic deep in the pit of my gut
My soul is being crippled from being a fool..
And not giving you up.
Copyright © Shane Hart | Year Posted 2013
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