Absolute, Eternal Loneliness

This is just a clumsy free verse, or rather, a pseudo-poem. Laugh at me if you like. I am what I am, whether you like me or not. **************** Yes, I remember it quite distinctly. It was 15 years ago that I realized how lonely I was. Until that time I had never known I was that lonely. In fact, I had never felt lonely or not lonely. But at that time, just a few days after my divorce, When all of a sudden I fell desperately, fatally in love with that devilish woman, I knew for the very first time in my life That I was actually eternally, absolutely lonely. Every second that I was not with her, I felt totally empty, craving her presence. I kept weeping, sobbing, and crying In my excruciating longing for a sight of her heavenly smiles. Then, one year after I first met her, Rumor reached me that she had got married to another man. I wanted to hear her giggles again, which had always thrilled me. But she never wanted to see or talk to me any more. Yes, it was when I met her for the first time That I knew I was eternally, absolutely lonely. Ever since that time, for the past 15 years, I have always been absolutely lonely, Feeling as though I were totally alone Without any human, animal, or even vegetable companion In this vast, pitch-dark, indifferent universe, Without any hope of my desperate voice Reaching anyone's ear.