Abc With Mummy - a Woman Scorned

A is for Ant (and for ass, your dad is an example of an ass) B is for Bee (and for b*stard, your dad is a bast*rd - first class) C is for Chicken (and for a word I don’t want to say - but see K) D is for Dog (and also for Dynamite - which I’d like to shove up your dad’s... see A) E is for Eagle (and for egotistical effing... see K... and C) F is for Frog (and for Fu*ker, which your dad’s been doing with someone who isn’t me) G is for Giraffe (and for Git - your dad is a Git... and he has two faces) H is for Horse (and for Hard Up - which your dad was... in too many places) I is for Insect (and for Insolvent, which thanks to me, he’ll soon be, with just one legal shove) J is for Jellyfish (and Judas. Your Dad’s a Judas... with a rash from his illicit love) K is for Kitten (and for making some words sound worse - see C) L is for Lion (and Lobster, a creature with claws that belongs at the bottom of the sea - hmmm...) M is for Mouse (and for machete and for manhood... which gives me an idea) N is for Newt (and Nymphomaniac - neither should work at IKEA) O is for Owl (and Optimistic, well, he thought that he left me fulfilled) P is for Penguin (and for Philandering, at which your daddy is skilled) Q is for Quail (and for Quickie, the best that your daddy could do) R is for Rabbit (and Rampant - and once I got that, how did we get you?) S is for Snail (and for Slug, which describes both your dad and his di*k) T is for Tiger (and Torrid, your dad was this with some Randy chick) U is for Unicorn (and Underhand, your dad was this night and day) V is for Vole (and also VD, hence the rash that was listed in J) W is for Worm (and for Merchant Banker, thats rhyming slang for your father) X is for Xerus (and X-rated gel, I bet he’ll work up quite a lather) Y is for Yak (and for Yesterday’s News, which is all your dad turns out to be Z is for Zebra (and for Zeees, that his Nympho is catching, asleep next to me) * [Xerus is a genus of African ground squirrel]