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A Successful Plight - Metamorph

Original - monorhyme Inside, he felt the time was right. He told himself, tonight's the night! The ring was in a box of white. Despite feeling anxious, and a little tight, he proposed to her, in the candlelight. She answered - yes, to his delight, which ended his successful plight! Rewrite - Rhyme This is it, he told himself! The time to propose is now! He wanted to ask her "the question," but wasn't, really sure, how! He bought a ring, in a little white box! His nerves were a literal mess! But everything turned out, delightful, because, the answer he got was a "yes!"

Copyright © | Year Posted 2013




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Date: 5/1/2013 6:03:00 PM
Ralph, Congratulations :-) In Debbie's "Metamorph" contest. always~ PD
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Date: 4/30/2013 3:44:00 PM
Great work about a very unique topic..Congrats on your great win..Sara
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Date: 4/28/2013 9:39:00 AM
Good work Ralph... Congrats on your win~A.O
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Date: 4/25/2013 7:06:00 PM
Congrats on your win Ralph :) wishing you a wonderful day :D g, Yanny
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Date: 4/25/2013 10:17:00 AM
Many congratulations Ralph , well done xx
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Date: 3/31/2013 10:36:00 AM
They both give a different mood. The monorhyme seems tightly wound whereas the re-write is more relaxed. I like them both.
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Date: 3/29/2013 12:36:00 PM
Good writing, Ralph. I can't decide which is my favorite. They're both delightful poems. :)
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Date: 3/28/2013 9:04:00 PM
Way to go, it's nice that you got the Girl!
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Book: Shattered Sighs