A Recipe For Humour

These humorous lines were inspired by
Viv Wigley's "Food Fight" contest. 
Could not resist the temptation:)
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Lettuce pray before eating.
He likes rabbit, but can’t stand hair in stew.
A carrot is worth its weight in gold.
To lam a lamb? Terrible!!
Is it wise to pare a pear before eating?
Chopin onions – not musical but certainly tearful!
The bull’s life is at steak.
Cross my heart said the honest brussel sprout. 
The pig was too thin...that saved his bacon.
Wearing a bird costume sent me raven mad.
Buy caviar from stir gin’s row.
The servant was maid to eat umble pie. 
She could hardly talk after eating hoarse meat.
He’s wrapped up in his food.
Humbug! This is apple sauce!
Excitement in the kitchen – fat in the fire.
A flounder struggles to walk. It’s flat footed.
I enjoyed my drink – pleased as Punch. 
One look at the dessert...I scream!
Take the guilt off the gingerbread. 
I invited the golfer to high tee.
Take your plaice at the table; we’re eating fish today.
Open the lid and reveal some of the meat. 
What a pity! The gobbling turkey had a lump in its throat. 
The peacemeal destroyed our friendship.
Make no bones about filleted fish. 
Next time just ask for dessert; don’t mince words.
Keep your eye on the roast, or else it will go to pot.

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Placed 3rd
© 28th December 2017
Copyright © | Year Posted 2017

Poem

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Chircop Avatar
March 28, 2026 at 8:06 AM
You’ve turned the kitchen into a playground of words, and it’s impossible not to smile reading this playful recipe for humour! I'm Charmaine Chircop's daughter and she suggested that I read your poems!
Callus Avatar
April 2, 2026 at 6:01 AM
Thank you for your lovely feedback, Christina; glad you enjoyed with a smile :) Pls pass on my regards to your mum. Happy Easter to you & your family // paul
Williams Avatar
January 7, 2018 at 3:36 AM
Congrats on your win Paul for this great Christmas repast of delicious humor. You're certainly on the boil and didn't mince your words while keeping an eye on the Roast. Shame about the pig - I was so looking forward to some pork - but fish will do. I enjoyed the humor
Callus Avatar
January 7, 2018 at 8:55 AM
We crack many jokes during our Christmas family meal, Maria, so why not share some humour with fellow Soupers, too!:) Thank you for the pleasant feedback...that elicited a smile, as well:) Regards // paul
Gauthier Avatar
January 2, 2018 at 1:52 PM
Congrats on your win, Paul.
Callus Avatar
January 2, 2018 at 3:00 PM
Thank you, Line. Hope your new year has started on a good footing:) Regards // paul
Kannan Avatar
December 31, 2017 at 7:20 AM
Wow... Awesome... Congratulations on you well deserved win... Wish you a very Happy New Year...
Callus Avatar
December 31, 2017 at 4:33 PM
Hi Supraja...I'm hurrying to answer all my mail before midnight rings, which is in 25 mins time! Your congrats together with the awesome comments have made my day:) I wish you a happy and prosperous New Year, my friend! Regards // paul
Rv Avatar
December 31, 2017 at 6:57 AM
Oh this is absolute genius.. Congratulations! 'Chopin' and 'high tee' were so clever. I hope you have a great 2018 :)
Callus Avatar
December 31, 2017 at 4:30 PM
Many thanks for your awesome feedback, Sneha:) Your lovely visit is much appreciated. ~ Wishing you a happy, healthy, prosperous, active new year full of inspiration! // paul
Rv Avatar
December 31, 2017 at 9:53 AM
I just found out - when you Google for images of a tee there's a definition of it along with the picture of tea (the beverage) - haha! xD
Downing  Avatar
December 30, 2017 at 10:17 PM
Just rereading this fun piece. And I'm glad to see it placed well in the contest. Congrats my dear friend! A wishing you a very healthy happy happy new year :) hugs and smiles :) Kina
Callus Avatar
December 31, 2017 at 4:27 PM
Thank you for the double visit, wishes and congrats, Akkina:) I too would like to wish you a happy, fruitful and inspired new year:) hugs and smiles // paul
Andresen Avatar
December 30, 2017 at 2:32 PM
- I love this humorous recipe, Paul :) - A winning poem ... good luck in the contest - My best wishes for a peaceful and lovely new year, and I thank you for your friendship through the year 2017 - hugs // Anne-Lise :)
Callus Avatar
December 31, 2017 at 4:24 PM
Thank you for reading and liking, Anne-Lise. Have just read your New Year's poem and left you my best wishes for the new year. Hugs // paul
Tripp Avatar
December 30, 2017 at 1:13 AM
Congratulations, Paul! Very well deserved. Brilliant. Sorry for my absence as of late. Will get back into the swing of things after the holidays.
Callus Avatar
December 31, 2017 at 10:03 AM
Thank you, Rhoda. We all have priorities and aches & pains that limit our presence @ Soup ... after all we're not tied by a contract:) Enjoy the holidays. Regards // paul
Dietrich Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 4:23 PM
You got in a lot of great food expressions, Paul. So glad to finally see what you WHIPPED UP!! BIG congrats to YOU!
Callus Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 4:27 PM
Many thanks, Andrea:) Your food sonnet was eggcellent!! Regards // paul
Murray Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 3:55 PM
All angles covered here Paul. Very well done. Congratulations.
Haight Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 3:40 PM
Indeed very clever, Paul! Congrats on your Podium win! Sandra
Callus Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 3:51 PM
Thank you, Sandra. A pleasure to have you stopping by. Regards & happy new year! // paul
One Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 8:42 AM
This is excellent, very creative, so glad Viv inspired you.. Congratulations..
Callus Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 1:53 PM
Thank you S-1. I just managed to enter it cos time was running out fast. Regards // paul
Gentile Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 6:09 AM
Congratulations Paul, Happy New Year!!
Callus Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 1:48 PM
Thank you, Mike. Happy new year to you, as well! // paul
Allison Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 3:44 AM
absolutely hilarious Paul and I just adored the line about the flounder! Such clever word play many congrats on your win:-) hugs jan xx
Callus Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 1:59 PM
Thank you, Jan. I saw the number of entries with one day to go, and decided to give my support to Mr Viv:) By the way, your entry could have easily placed above mine! Hugs // paul
Wigley Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 1:41 AM
Congrats on your placement in my contest Paul, a fine write it is. Much enjoyed. Well done. Regards, Viv
Callus Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 1:51 PM
Thank you Viv; pleased with my unexpected placement! It was a pleasure to support this contest. Wishing you all the very best for 2018. Regards // paul
Ashley Avatar
December 28, 2017 at 8:22 PM
Paul, a creative poem with clever wordplay and a perfect title as well. I enjoyed very much you wit and your write! Warmest wishes always.. ~Susan
Callus Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 2:33 PM
Thank you, Susan. It was a fun write, not what I'd call a poem, but it can claim its fair share of inspiration:) ~ Warm regards // paul
Downing  Avatar
December 28, 2017 at 7:23 PM
Oh what a fun read. But wait, I need to grab me some icecream to snack on while enjoying this delish piece :) awesome write, Paul!
Callus Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 2:50 PM
Thank you for reading and enjoying, Akkina:) May I grab this opportunity to wish you all the very best for 2018! Warm regards // paul
Krampe Avatar
December 28, 2017 at 5:44 PM
Very enjoyable poem, Paul; I love word play!
Callus Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 2:51 PM
So glad that you enjoyed it, Agnes...thank you! Regards & and best wishes for the new year. // paul
Michael Avatar
December 28, 2017 at 5:14 PM
Really creative use of words... I like it...All the best Paul
Callus Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 3:26 PM
Pleased that you liked it, Arturo. Best regards // paul
Bauer Avatar
December 28, 2017 at 4:53 PM
i enjoyed this one, paul! i'm impressed with all the cool examples you came up with...
Callus Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 3:25 PM
Thank you for the lovely comments, Ilene. Best regards // paul
Pandit Avatar
December 28, 2017 at 4:17 PM
A fun read--you did well Paul with so many words of dual meaning--creative poem!
Callus Avatar
December 29, 2017 at 3:54 PM
Thank you for the lovely comments, Vijay. All the best // paul
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