A Puppy's Tail

I'm the family treasure, a Christmas gift to grant the children's wish. My first time out I stray away and start rolling in a fish. I flap my tongue and wag my tail looking for a hug. They're less impressed when I start dragging my butt across the rug. I'm really smart but get confused... not sure how some things are. Especially when told the litter box is not a cookie jar. I have lots of things such as bones and towels that give me constant joy. But always pout when strictly told the Cat is not a squeaky toy. Are Mailmen food? I'm not so sure if studies have been done? They're hard to catch, quite fleet of foot and always prone to run. I'm tough as nails, the family's rock, truly a natural wonder. But I have my limits when storm's persist and what's the deal with thunder? Every Thursday without fail two bald men looking gruff. These 'garbage men,' these hounds from hell, they come and steal our stuff. I sound the alarm but they seem unmoved taking all I tend to crave. Then mock me till my shame's complete by giving me a wave. I get no thanks and receive no credit for spilling from the can. I'm locked away with no justice here, a victim of the 'man.' In puppy prison I serve my time, they're calling me a brat. But who shows up to make things worse but that stupid friggin' Cat. I hate that Cat who stares all day, always free to roam. All he does is eat and sleep while I'm forced to guard the home. He does make me laugh I must admit, he may not be too bright. As he gets befuddled when Humans use a red dot pointy light. It could be worse, the job's okay, I may not be as cute. But the pay is good with the People kind and work's a short commute. When at my end with a life well led... I will hear the angel's call. I'll go to heaven and politely ask... 'Please God, return my balls.' *For those who might be interested. I will be posting my cartoon 'Bob's your Uncle' on my homepage. A new one will appear every second day.