A Gone But Precious Friend Pt 1
title may change
this is to one of my closest friends who committed suicide, R.I.P Taylor Frostsong/ Jeanette Jenkins
she was my best friend
she was a very close friend but how did I not know
that she was in so much pain
why did I not see her attempt at death coming.
But her attempt, unlike mine, was a success of her hanging
and here I write about her
she was an amazing friend
and over the summer
for 3 days straight
almost continually
trying to talk
me out of suicide
and me
out of my dark hole
of hopelessness and despair
where I suffered
through my memories
and where I was living in pain;
of not being able to see my own son,
of losing my therapist to a heart attack,
and in the depression of not helping anyone
and I suffered
from the mistakes I made
but why
why did I not do anything
I recognized the signs;
the slowly drifting away
the less frequent phone calls
and Facebook messages
why did I not help her?
Why did I not listen?
in my heart
I knew something was wrong
but why did I not act
and I know
if I had gotten to her
I could have saved her
and she would still be here
I could have stopped it
but I didn't even try
and because of this failure
my failure of accepting the signs
and disbelieving what was true
I lost her
and I lost one of my most precious friends.
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