A Gone But Precious Friend Pt 1

title may change

this is to one of my closest friends who committed suicide, R.I.P Taylor Frostsong/ Jeanette Jenkins


she was my best friend
she was a very close friend but how did I not know
that she was in so much pain
why did I not see her attempt at death coming.
But her attempt, unlike mine, was a success of her hanging
and here I write about her
she was an amazing friend
and over the summer
for 3 days straight
almost continually
trying to talk
me out of suicide
and me
out of my dark hole
of hopelessness and despair
where I suffered
through my memories
and where I was living in pain;
of not being able to see my own son,
of losing my therapist to a heart attack,
and in the depression  of not helping anyone
and I suffered
from the mistakes I made
but why
why did I not do anything
I recognized the signs;
the slowly drifting away
the less frequent phone calls
and Facebook messages
why did I not help her?
Why did I not listen?
in my heart
I knew something was wrong
but why did I not act
and I know
if I had gotten to her
I could have saved her
and she would still be here
I could have stopped it
but I didn't even try
and because of this failure
my failure of accepting the signs
and disbelieving what was true
I lost her
and I lost one of my most precious friends.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2014

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A   Avatar
December 26, 2014 at 10:21 PM
JORDON, Awesome Best of 2014 poem, and win.... Congrats.... Linda
Miller Avatar
December 30, 2014 at 10:46 AM
thanks and its jordan
Mehta Avatar
December 18, 2014 at 5:25 AM
Heartfelt write and a nice tribute, congratulations on the win, Jordan
Miller Avatar
December 18, 2014 at 10:18 AM
thank you
Allison Avatar
December 17, 2014 at 2:13 PM
Simply simply heartbreaking my heart goes out to you and her family:-( congrats on your win it is great this will be read more widely:-) Hugs jan xxx
Allison Avatar
December 18, 2014 at 10:24 AM
Keep strong Jordan and remember the good times with her:-) Hugs Jan xxx
Miller Avatar
December 18, 2014 at 10:18 AM
thank you so much, I am going to really miss her *hugs back* I didn't even think it would be a top 10 finish
Manassian Avatar
December 5, 2014 at 11:45 AM
I can't even begin to understand the pain that you must be going through. I'm sorry for your loss. Suicide leaves scars that never mend. I've been at the edge myself. I know some of that pain. I hope you find healing in knowing that your friend is not in pain anymore. God is merciful...Leave all your questions in His hands.
Miller Avatar
December 9, 2014 at 9:58 AM
thank you so much, I am on the edge myself but I know she would want me to keep going on
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