A Decade of Depression

heard the sound!!! She is Gone!!! Gone Forever!!! 2001...who would have thought that...that would be the last time i would ever see you!!! History Repeating Itself... 7 yrs later...I heard the sound!!! She's Gone Max!!! Gone Forever!!! Two Mothers...One Soul...Entering Heaven...Thats the Goal!!! Mission Accomplished!!! I Know!!! NEVER GOT THE CHANCE TO SAY I LOVE YOU NEVER GOT THE CHANCE TO HUG YOU NEVER GOT THE CHANCE TO SAY THANK YOU NEVER GOT THE LAST CHANCE TO SEE YOU SELFISH I KNOW!!! BUT WHO WOULD BELIEVE YOU WOULD LEAVE SO QUICKLY Treated life for granted so now im taking the punishment!!! Never ? God so why yall left me!!! too much pain and suffering i understand completely... From Diabetes to low breathing...and stressful dayz to emotional rollercoasting!!! Sibilings Fighting...drama uplifting...but when yall passed away...there was a resolution!!! For some strange reason I keep on smiling at the sun even though there are clouds feeling the warmth of the love from yall but there is a blizzard inside!!! Inside my BODY!!! SOUL IS COLD...I WAS A BAD SON CURSING...STEALING...GANGBANGING!!!D ISREPESCTUL... YET YALL STILL ADOPTED ME...WHEN I DIDNT HAVE A FAMILY!!! DIDNT DESERVE IT BUT I CHERISH IT SO WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT I HAD A DECADE OF DEPRESSION I used to run from my mistakes.... Tried to hide my short-comings. But it's hard to pull the puppet strings when you're the wooden dummy...Well... let me tell you what I am today!!! See Im a confused delirious man who thinks of 2nd opinions: doctors who doesn’t give a damn about me Father who left me and ran away No Brothers but 1 sister who said who cares!!! Lost 2 Mothers!!! Never Had a Legit Family!!! Turned my heart to stone. Petrified Pretty Much... Til this day Im Still Running Waiting for the person who can TAKE THEIR PLACE...HELP ME PLEASE!!! Give me A purpose. Give me A meaning. Help me speak without A stutter... Help me learn the lesson so im never left with... WHY I TOOK ADVANTAGE OF MY MOTHERS... Out of Sight...Out of Mine... 2010 begins a whole new decade!!! No More Depression If times get hard and I dont know who to call on or talk to... I can always reach my mothers in heaven and talk to My Father(God) through my heart R.I.P Roberta Costello R.I.P Suzanne Gaudet