A Cure To My Inner Thoughts

"A Cure To My Inner Thoughts." Today I need a little help from my brain as I was at war with myself. I need to do something maybe teach my act of kindness to weave from my evil thoughts awake my dormant reality to bring me closer in harmony with my actual life. Pained by my actions of yesterday When I felt half alive, as I turned Seventy two of age and lost the feeling of belonging, I felt robbed of my youth left alone naked sitting on a bench with my ego. Suffering could be felt in my depth When I realized we cannot always Have answers to our question marks. Why? I asked myself. Why did I lack the power of intentions To attract into my life my man even at that age? Questions still are entangled With the "NO" answers? why I asked Am I not in a state of love? why do I want to leave him and go away After forty years of absolute love? I will find the truth I promised myself. Here is why today I aged memories are fading away fear of death accompanies Me wherever I go each nights sleep does not come to me easily the belief is getting to close to an end. That is why? I shouldn't let go I need to save myself I have to find some answers instead of waiting for the eruption of my soul to blow i need to ignore the red lava of death and run towards The tunnel of light to rest my delusional thoughts of the Moment. Suddenly, my soul felt that peace when a hand cured my sufferings pounded by a powerful vibration that woke me up capable of starting a new life leaving everything else behind me. A beginning to exercise my mind to change The whole concept of my brain open a channel between my body and mind. I felt good growing older as I know that I will always remain in love with my man I will give him back the keys to my life And together walk pass that door with Hope surrounding our shadows The continuation of a beginning. If love was a choice? Why would I choose to be in pain? Why can`t I see through his eyes The fear of loosing me? Why can`t I listen to the background Music and ache for another Tomorrow with him?. I wanted so much the impossible To happen i wanted to make things better before the sun rises and surrenders to the night. At the end of this day I cannot imagine our home without him. I would hate to miss our early rising When we flew towards the beach Have breakfast while listening to the rumbling of the ocean. Our coming back hand in hand crossing the bridge and watch the falling leaves rest quietly where they belong decorating our pavement for us to leave our foot traces behind for another day. It was my last chance not to loose him. I will Prevent Him from walking away As He is My Rock. Therese Bacha 20/12/2011