My Desire
I stop hating
I stop loving
I stop thinking
I stop caring
I stop shaking
I stop living
Every day so I can look in the mirror
Every day to hide my deepest fear
In order to stand up straight
I pretend not to believe in fate
The future is a place I don't belong
Every decision I've ever made is wrong
Is it possible for me to exist like this
When only my past is what I miss
I've lost my family
I've lost my friends
I've lost my enemies
I've lost my heart
I've lost my life
I've lost myself
Searching for a reason I'll never find
A dark truth that will never unwind
Trapped in my mind, decisions of the past
Wondering how long this feeble life will last
On the outside I am able to maintain
But inside I can feel myself going insane
I am losing grip on who I used to be
Hating most of all the inner me
I wish for nothing
I desire everything
I wish for darkness
I desire peace of mind
I wish for emptiness
I desire Death
Copyright © Matthew Lowell | Year Posted 2015
|