Anorexia
The scale starts to call and I cannot resist; constantly drawn to my biggest fear.
The painful number that I see, never leaves my mind.
Every day. Every minute. Every second. She never stops - this voice inside my head.
She speaks to me. She yells at me. So hurtful; the words that she says.
I will never be who she wants me to be.
"Don't eat that", she pleads. "Look in the mirror and you'll see."
"You're fat!" "You're pathetic!" "You're a failure!", she screams.
She makes me cry, as I fall to my knees - tears falling down, I will never succeed.
I'll never be good enough. She will never be pleased.
Complete perfection is what Ana seeks.
I am her slave, but she's good to me.
She gives me strength, yet makes me weak.
Ana tries to make me thin. She brings me hope. She's all I need.
And even if I tried to break free...her disease has already taken hold of me.
Copyright © Jacki Murphy | Year Posted 2020
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