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Best Poems Written by Kevin Crossed

Below are the all-time best Kevin Crossed poems as chosen by PoetrySoup members

Details | Kevin Crossed Poem

Gender Dysphoria

Faulty biology adds a perfect suffering
Tears in my throat leave me weakly stuttering
Fear, pain, and angst leaves my body cold and shuddering
Dark thoughts make me unconscious, slumbering
I ask about your day and leave your soul merely ignored
A lack of words, useless screams onto the lord
Of which I lack belief, although desperation cold
Closes shut my eyelids and embraces my own soul

No one seems to notice all the pain which I withhold

Abort physical pain and the infinite dysphoria
Add the opposite of pleasure and orgasmic euphoria
The result is numbness in an infinite dystopia
I see 2 men in the mirror like I'd suffer from dyplopia
I feel sickness for myself as a man with autophobia
I vomit blood, I've cracked my skull because of nausea
My lack of genitalia leaves me with phantom limbs
I can't really describe it more than limbs that don't exist

Will I ever be okay, or will this pain persist?

Details | Kevin Crossed Poem

Emotions That Bear No Name

You know, the cold void in your mind
The type that makes your sanity go blind
It lingers long and turns your lips blue
It sticks your vocal chords stuck like glue
Your lungs shrink as you try to breathe
It drops you onto your knees in defeat
It nibbles your meat and drains all the heat
A blackened disease that leaves you deceased

As the silver kisses your skin, it remains
You try to stay calm, you try to stay sane
But you hear it calling and shouting your name
Making you scream and create crimson stains
The silver devours your skin as you cry
You're asking it screaming, asking it why
Full saturation just passes you by
Light always seems to escape from your eyes

Details | Kevin Crossed Poem

Sadness

My wrists are stinging, my skin is burning
None to protect from winter, I'm not here for learning
Everyday acts are a method of torture
Said all was fine whilst my skin I tore through
I say I'm alright to have no one to talk to
Said I was just tired, seems nobody taught you
Said I hadn't eaten and that I wasn't going to
I wish I could trust them so I could tell them what I go through
I'm still faulty in their eyes, a feminine figure
I don't dare to tell them, why? Go figure.
I've tainted the sink to a strong blood red
With both of these pains, the demons keep getting fed
Oh god, I can barely even breathe
Relax then relapse, that's the logic that I see
Tell me to give up, and just let go
I gladly would hang myself with a rope
I only use razors for one single thing
I'm pretty damn sure that you can guess what it is

Details | Kevin Crossed Poem

Beheaded Rabbit

Little rabbit run away
Lead the enemy astray
Make them lost, make them sad
Deep, bad, regret, mad
Anguish and privacy
Hibernation finally
Shut your eyes, go to sleep
In your dreams, you will find me
Stone intestines, broken sticks
Move as fast as the clock ticks

Details | Kevin Crossed Poem

Die

Your timeline is close to your grave
It's soon time for your flesh to decay
I hear screams outside my screens
And I'm feeling scared of homicidal means
I'm scared of my demons and suicidal thoughts
Out of my skin ascends bloody dots
Out of life descends bloody corpses
No one can find the fatal source to disorders
No more sympathy for undeserving souls
Who can't stand up to the words that they told
Cowardice is your only definition
Why isn't self-harm your unhealthy addiction?

Details | Kevin Crossed Poem

Colourless Rainbow

A mental wall of pain and thrall
With silent sobs and bodies sprawled
Onto this note I hastily scrawl
The memories that I recall

I recall a rainy night
With blood so red at sheets so white
I was sad and filled with fright
It feels like now, from Hell I write

A blackened soul, a heart so cold
An empty mind, a fragile soul
This pain I barely cannot hold
I've almost lost my self-control

A deep inhale and then deeper I thrust
I don't really want to do it, but I must
Not a soul in this world I can truly trust
This world is purely useless and unjust

I can no longer live with this pain
If I remain I will not stay sane
I will have to be caged and restrained
To not cause pain to those in my way

To paint the glistening snow a warm red
Then put your cold body back in your bed
I write a note to deceive the fools
Then at night, I take them too 

My will is strong, please help me rot
Because alive, I'm just a dot
Around my neck is a slipknot
Cause live like this, I cannot

Say that again, cause I forgot
What made blood on my arms a lot
And your aggression is quite odd
You are the victim, I am not

Details | Kevin Crossed Poem

Creature

It sees It follows. With Its eyes so hollow.
It hears, It knows. But has no ear nor nose.
It feels, It touches. It shows no mercy nor justice.
It speaks, It screams on the top of Its lungs.
It tastes my fear with It's sharp, black tongue.
It scratches the walls and tells me about my flaws.
With Its tongue and black, large, razor sharp claws. 
It feeds on my mind with Its sharp teeth.
It moves at light speed with Its hands and feet.
It smells fear and It loves it so much.
At first, I was comfortable with Its soft touch.
It threatens and shows things I don't want to see.
It will always stay in sight, watching.
It tells me to do things I know I shouldn't.
And it makes me do things I thought I couldn't.
If It's not in sight then you should be afraid.
Cause when you see It behind you, it's already too late.
Though It dosesn't seek to harm, It wants me to go insane.
It wants me to suffer in mental pain and make my own blood stains.
It does not have a name.
And It's not a creature made by my brain.
If I ever see It there's no use to run away.
Cause once It's come It's here to stay.
It will keep watching me every day.
And It will threaten to cause great pain.
On people I love and then It'll show.
Ways for them to die I wish I'd never known. 
"I'm not going insane, It's not even real."
It makes me feel feelings I didn't know I could feel.
To summarize, every day is a living nightmare.
And it's a pain and horror that I cannot bear.

Details | Kevin Crossed Poem

Unconscious and Not Breathing

Red, the colour covers my arms
Deep within are glass shards
Show me no mercy and send no regards
Don't stitch me up and cover my scars
Cut my lips, tell them I'm smiling
Every day, I keep on lying
Dishonesty quickly gets very tiring
I'm slowly rotting, slowly expiring

If anybody actually cared
Would I really be pulling my hair?
Would I really be cutting my skin?
Pulling my tendons like puppet strings?
Would my heart really miss him?
As I try to pour out all my sins
If sins were black, all would be darkness
An evil void, lonely and heartless
Choking on sadness and blinded by madness
Isolated vastness, I am feeling anxious
Razors are paintbrushes, skin is my canvas
If it's not depression, then it is malice

Before I lay in my coffin
You see my blood glossing
My eyes water as I see you panic
And my existence slowly vanish
I observe my bleeding wrists
Moving towards the sleeping mist
On bloody notes, I weakly reminisce
Wondering of my needing to exist
My skin is burning but it is not incinerated
My vision is blurry, my mind is intoxicated
My body is hollow, neatly eviscerated
I choke on rose petals, I am suffocating

Details | Kevin Crossed Poem

Alone and Depressed

Here I am alone and depressed, a partner is only a dream.
I don't think I'll ever find someone, who's as crazy as me.
Scars on my arms, blood on the knife.
But the blood is not actually mine.
See what I mean?
Do I really seem, like a fallen angel lost in a dream?
I wish I was dead, like the voices in my head. 
I want them to shut up, I've cried and I've begged.
You think I'm crazy right?
But it's not nice, to fight every day and cry every night.
I've never felt it so tempting to only see a knife.
I've never felt so tempted to take my own life.
I've never felt so tempted to pick up a blade.
Shove it into someone, and make their life fade away.
My tears are freezing from the ice cold lies.
That for years have tormented my daily life.
I don't want to look in the mirror anymore, I never want to see my face again.
All I own now is paper and pens and no friends.
I want my mind to be cleansed before I take my life to an end.
If you do not feel my pain, then you don't have the right to complain.
I'd like to cleanse my brain with cutting, but that wouldn't make me more sane.
I hate life, but I love to see you suffer.
Watch you filled with fear as you weakly stutter.
One cut, two cuts, three cuts, four.
Watch you slowly bleed to death, dying on the floor.

Details | Kevin Crossed Poem

Depressed Boy

He wanted to cut, he wanted to die.
He wanted to spread his wings and to fly.
Every day he asked why he was alive.
Every night he cut himself as he quietly cried.
School was not an uplifter, he just got beat up.
He sobbed, curled up and begged for some help up.
Everybody saw him but nobody cared.
It was not nice of them, it was not fair.
He got teased because of his body.
He never had a friend, he had nobody.
He was unloved, he said, "nobody wants me."
He told them to stop, "The voices, they haunt me."
His depression got deeper and so did his cuts.
He started thinking about murder, like splitting up guts.
He'd imagined stabbing people and watching the blood gushing.
Especially the bullies, cause to them he was nothing.
He went through many years of pain, and his mother knew nothing.
The bitch didn't care, so he lied, he was bluffing.
He tried pills, hanging and jumping from the roof.
He wished that his voice wasn't as quiet as the scream of a fool. 
It was hard to say that it would all be okay.
But it's hard to stay sane when the pain doesn't fade away. 
Wake up in the middle of the night.
Start thinking bad thoughts, then quietly cry.
Take a blade and split it up, watch the blood trickle.
Whenever it touched his skin he just felt a tickle.
Took a deep breath and tried to drown himself.
Anybody could actually offer some help.
But not many knew he didn't dare to tell.
That every day of his life was a living hell.
He took the pills, hung the rope, shot himself with a gun.
He got hospitalized and there ended all the fun.
Nothing worked, the pain ate him alive.
He couldn't flush the blades or put the pills aside.
He wanted to be hungry, not to skip another meal.
But what was left inside of him was still firmly concealed.
In the end, not many didn't know about his pain.
Or why the blood ran out of his veins.
They just saw it but didn't care.
Everybody knew but no one dared.
He decided to get a gun again and use it.
Cause he couldn't take it he was about to lose it.
The pain was too much so he put the gun to his head.
So congrats for not caring cause now he's finally dead.