Best Poems Written by Aundrea Dickard

The Night and the Aftermath

something was taken from her 
hacked away from her innards
leaving debris and deadly tatters behind

the ringing sounds throughout her head 
the alarm that first alerted her
that she is already dying from the inside out 

heart slowed to almost a bleak nothingness
she holds onto herself for dear life
struggling to glue herself
before it’s too late to pick up the pieces

there’s a poisonous trail 
so black and so blue
destined to turn purple 
and eventually a yellowish hue

her reflection stares back
with those sad lifeless eyes
begging her to take back her life
knowing that the task is nearly unattainable

the tears stay locked inside
leaving nothing but an emptiness
a desolate hole in which she avoids

she keeps a smile on her face
but the visions come unexpected
sitting there, they play a movie

knock 
knock 
knock
she can hear it 

in and out 
in and out 
in and out
she can feel it

her brain screams at her to speak up
to say something - to yell
but it reached an inability to function 

her eyes are heavy
just like the weight on her chest


slowly
slowly
slowly
they close

everything disappears again 

day after day
and night after night
it’s banned from her imagination 

she blocked the movie from playing

she tried to forget
to pretend that it was a nightmare
because that’s all it was

Right?

Right? 

Right? 

then it dawned on her
reality is synonymous to a nightmare

it’s all relative in hindsight
and that realization is the beginning
beginning of following the trail 

still visible - yet fading - she followed them
a part here and a part there
all the way to the end
right between her thighs
that’s where it all ceases to nothing

they fade on her body
but will always be marked in her mind



she’ll close her soulless eyes
only to see that girl in the mirror
staring back at her and all that she is

days will never be the same 
this she already knows

they say it gets better with time
but she finds that it only becomes magnified 

hard times really don’t get easier
the pain just becomes a part of us  

Doesn’t it?

Doesn’t it?

Doesn’t it? 

she breathes in 
and she breathes out
praying to a God 
she doesn’t quite believe in

praying for a day
she wants to fully exist in again
a day where what was once taken
can be replaced with something else

she prays for that day
knowing that day is not today
nor tomorrow

praying that is exists
that it will eventually become real

that day might come
but not today

Copyright © Aundrea Dickard | Year Posted 2017