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Best Poems Written by Ceri Louise Baylis

Below are the all-time best Ceri Louise Baylis poems as chosen by PoetrySoup members

Details | Ceri Louise Baylis Poem

My Confined Mind

Untamed self control my own worst enemy I can be
I can not be the poison and the remedy
The voices I hear are not in my head
I hear the words as if they’ve been said.
Horrific thoughts I must endure
Collective voices worse than before
The madness escalates, reducing me to an unbalanced state 
A break mentally so much others can not relate
Psychotic attack or psychotic illusion
Is it reality or is it a delusion?
Derogatory constant running commentary
Over thinking causing chaos; corrupting my mind
No escape nor shred of peace can I find
The voices I hear don’t stop they don’t give in,
Continuously ranting of dishonourable sin
I attempt to deter from mental confusions
Medically my thoughts are seen as delusions
At the time I'm not convinced I'm deluded
Convinced by distorted reality I've concluded
Distorted assumptions that I have concocted -now real
Escalated with time a darkness clouds how I feel
Negativity takes over positive thoughts 
Hearing uttering of endless hurtful talk
Resulting in what I hear as being true
Suspicions conspire then conclusions are drew

Hateful words; closer louder unable to ignore
Detachment from any logical thought	
From the derogatory talk I hear is believed
Its how I am seen its how I am perceived
Over thinking causing chaos corrupting my mind
Peace & positivity I can not find
Voices persecuting me to such an extent 
Relentless and nasty horrid content….
Like on repeat although the night
I hear them talking but there out of sight
Surely they must tyre of slagging me off
Nasty unimaginative hateful lot

Voices of those that I know and those I am close too;
My mental state decreases concluding its true
Every emotion dark with dread and fear
Panic derived from all that I hear 
I cant shut it out all of the time I take it all in
Persecuted of every action I do, I cant win
Unable to recall past psychotic occurrences
No deterrent from the cognitive disturbances

The voices never stop they don’t go away
With given time I’ll believe what they say
Whether it be a regrettable act or gossips fabricated lies
All of my self worth and confidence dies

Auditory hallucinations not willing to stop
All reasoning fact and logic forgot
Blinds my judgement and ability to see
harrowing Paranoia descends to reality
Hearing the conversations and ruthless content
Persecuting me to such an extent 
Medically my thoughts are seen as delusions
I attempt to deter from mental confusions

Panic, detached irrational thought assumptions
Loss of control and distraught
When the worst of the worst is easing 
Confusion remains
I question was it real or am I insane
I know now what I thought was deluded
I cant believe what I've previously concluded
At the time what I thought was real
Inability to control how I feel
Disbelief descends when delusions ease
relief  then comes from what I previously perceived.

Details | Ceri Louise Baylis Poem

Terminal Cancer

Cancer it breaks cancer it takes
It erodes and corrodes body and soul
Lingers and takes hold  cant be stopped or controlled
Terminal is with an apparent ending
Loss of hope and no point in pretending
Life span is against natures clock
Head now on the proverbial block
Spreads with ease the cardinal disease
Painful fulfilment never set to ease
Deterioration quickens as the body weakens
The illness  striving towards winning Beacons 
Inhabiting this life just day  to day living
Illness taking everything with it unforgiving
Maintain dignity the only plea of life left
Cancers taken everything will be till death
Being the shadow of ones former self
A serious turn for the worst inevitable ill health
Oh its just sods law to over through a bad habit
Of smoking only to contract lung cancer damn it
Undetected unnoticed overseen  by mere testing
Cancer accumulating cells rapidly  and festering
Agonising pain fills ones veins no relief no escape
The moment of death ones lonely never-ending wait
In the last moments the death rattle echo's consumes last breath
The only hope remaining is there's life after death.

Details | Ceri Louise Baylis Poem

The Suicide Soul

A life uninhabited by the suicide soul
life ground him down and took its toll
once a fruitful hardworking life endured
grandeur created from dreams obscured 
Being an Entrepreneur creating millionaire lifestyle
every year that past money making was futile
The fairground life was all that he had known 
a place for amusement a place where he'd grown
betrayed by his peers sold out now insubstantial
business driven only means to survive were financial 
life meaningless with all accomplishment now worthless
a requirement to living had now become surplused
escalating worry of money, health decreasing
only one outcome, a need to end it increasing
showing a deceptive facade to all he was fine
April 5th was the date to end a 50 year lifetime
accompanied by whiskey, gun and a Dictaphone
he recorded drunken passages of time all alone
He had drove and drove to his final destination
a desolate place for the act and no hesitation
pulled out a double barreled shot gun, lay on the bank
with a one shot to the head where the bullet sank.

Details | Ceri Louise Baylis Poem

At the Beginning When God Created Sex

At the beginning when god created sex;
He didn't create a stud and a temptress 
He didn't intend sex to be sordid 
Sins of the flesh wont be rewarded 

One who has lustful intent has committed adultery,
Sexual immorality is passion, evil desire is idolatry,

To be married is what the bible does envisage, 
So God created man in his own image,
To abstain from the passions of the flesh
Adulterers are bound to hell their souls to enmesh 
Sins of sex wage war against your soul
Husband and wife should honor each role

The act was intended for procreation
Not the result of heated flirtation
We now live in a world that is depraved 
How many of us will see their soul saved?

Details | Ceri Louise Baylis Poem

Addiction of the Soul

I cant live with my profound instability  
I cant be the poison and the remedy
I can inform, enlighten, give an idea;
cant explain how my reality's so severe
Not willing to accept that I am actually an addict
That my day to day life is controlled by a habit
Over indulgence in substance abuse
Determined by no reasonable excuse 
Taunted by inner demons I have created
Suffer of Psychotic schizophrenia; drug related 
Will power ceases to exist never to reappear
Self control lost with the inability to commandeer
Sobriety brings lack of interest, days mundane
From the daily use of speed i must refrain
The need for a high overcomes any felt lows
No lesson learnt from how bad my mind goes
My own worst enemy from drug dependency
No one else to blame because of ascendancy
ever seeking that intoxicating rush and feeling
until i realise that its from addiction i need freeing.

Details | Ceri Louise Baylis Poem

Negativity Breeds Negativity

How can you live with such a negative mind
Only thriving on misery and tales unkind
You wonder why you have such bad luck
When its all Happiness you drain and suck
Your outlook is dark and bleak
No positivity do you seek
Inflicting your woe on all that will listen
Like a plague, sorrow you do christen
Your outlook physically drains me
I have one and only single plea
Is that you seek some positivity
What will it take for you to see
That from the bad comes negativity 
No good can come from misery 
This is the truth you fail to see.

Details | Ceri Louise Baylis Poem

Loyal Friend

Your loyal and trustworthy; a true special kind
Beautiful soul in spirit & mind
You are a person whom I can depend
Thank you for being such a good friend
Thank you for being supportive & not giving up
You were persistent to pull me out of that rut
Your caring, sharing and so much like me…..
With the same points of view and personality
Being so concerned when I was so wrong
Im sorry I was unresponsive for so long 
I cant face anyone when I’m enduring emotional hell
 express what is wrong you dealt me well
No one has ever been there for me the way that you have
We’ve connected, sure now to have always have a laugh
I’m grateful for your persistence to ensure I was well
So Supportive you were caught me when I fell
Every person calls associates ‘friends’. They’re not…
………..When its a network of associates we’ve got
True friends only appear a few times during life
Strength being offered in times of trouble & strife
We have so much in common that makes me smile
Our friendship makes days of time now worth while

Details | Ceri Louise Baylis Poem

At the Time I Wasnt Ready

Emotional torment is what has conspired
From a decision I made and reality that transpired
A mistake so great only myself to blame
Unexpected pregnancy the guilt does remain
Trapped in abusive relationship no support id receive
Abortion the only option my loss to alone bereave
No maternal instinct  no other way to go
Except for breaking my moral standing code
As I don't believe in abortion killing life that’s just begun
But I had no other choice it was all that could be done
No way or means of supporting a young life
With a suffering relationship resulting in strife
I didn't see it as a baby as it had not had time to form
I do still wonder what would of happened if it had been born
Will I go to hell for extinguishing a life that was forming?
Only know on judgement day for my innocence I will be imploring
Its best to know your not ready to sustain a child in this world
Than recklessly inflicting life that I would become too furl
A burden to raise a child singlehandedly with no help
As Stephen was clear on making his true feelings felt
It infuriates me more as if his response had acted in my decision
As  a baby would destroy my reality and future vision
I do want children but with someone that wants them too
So I must settle down and commit it is what I must surely do
Im sure my soul mate is out there destined to wander on my path
And that special someone will become my one true fath.

Details | Ceri Louise Baylis Poem

Lust Wrong Time Wrong Person

I was trying to steer clear of the type I adore
Refrain from where I've went wrong before
Lad about town with that criminal behaviour
In the long run he will not  work in my favour
But I cant help my emotions drawn in by they're act
Full of something more that the nice boy had lacked
Shallow outlook I have as nice looks make the package
Cant contain myself from misbehaved Baggage 
As I refuse to learn I must endure hurt and loss
As he will be someone that ive never quite  got!
The one who wasn't like anyone else
Completely changed how I once felt
A relationship he didn't want as he told me 
I thought he’d be someone I’d no longer see
But then confused me completely by staying in touch
Spending most days together increasing my lust
I enjoyed every moment obviously
Each day together un-expectantly
couldn't let go what so ever
Unsure how to be when we were together
No move I did make in case of rejection 
But a deep desire to share my affection
One thing I was sure of our time wouldn't last
Certain I’d regain contact as I learnt from the past
Catching my interest always from what I can find
He managed to distract my wayward mind
Cant forget someone that’s given you so much to remember
Hoping that we could spend more time together
Happy where he decided to spend his time
If only for a short while to call him mine.

Details | Ceri Louise Baylis Poem

Just Let Me Grieve

The fondness and affection which I always came to give,
Has now gone away, simply ceases to exist,
My mind is now contained by a deep and heavy mist-
Cant concentrate on others, nothing more I have to give,
My troubles are now amplified as I proceed to live
My sister stopped me grieving pushing  to sell my home,
Her deep seated bitterness is apparent in her tone
Making plans behind my back which has caused me much dismay
Her plans of spending money that will eventually come her way
I don’t feel the security of having family now 
The sister connection ended and now one I wont allow
Sick of the pretence and conversation hiding what should be said
Her only ability to understand real life came from something that she read
Dad is no longer with this world neither is my mother
Before mum and I could always rely on one another. 
I fear the inner dark thoughts that remain from my losses
Morbidly aware we all bare our crosses
its all out of my control which invokes Hatred I feel 
the explosion of uncontrollable feelings are real
fine line breaks quickly between  love and hate
am I now on the right path written from fate?
past relationships were fickle I falsely gave love to all 
ive created a callous inner wall
scared I cant love and alone I feel
only enjoying intoxication to mask what is real  
Life teaches lessons that are not written anywhere
Choices decisions and mistakes are ours to bear 
Endlessly trying to focus my attention to hope
To remain so strong and continue to cope.