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Nicole Glass Poem
We were babies together, you and I.
Then toddlers, teetering, side by side.
Learning to walk in life, hand in hand.
Balancing each other as we struggled to stand.
You never knew, cause I had to be strong,
But I feared everyday that I'd do something wrong.
A bump on the head, the wrong kind of juice.
Am I doing this right?
Can't fail- no excuse!
Even the best parents are filled with doubt.
Am I leaving a scar anytime that I shout?
Could I have done more to prepare, and protect?
Warn them of monsters, but keep fear in check?
Have I been a good influence, or sealed their fate?
So many questions whose answers must wait.
Then just the other day I looked into your eyes.
A reflection of myself took me by surprise.
As I listened to you speak, your voice came through as mine.
My question was answered- you would be fine.
Our struggles in life can leave a deep well.
I planted survival and you've reaped it well.
Though we've seen dark days, we continue to shine.
My story is your's, your story is mine.
From you I learned patience, compassion, and laughter.
I gained strength and courage that lasted long after.
I raised you from child into woman, you see
But what I did for you, so you did for me.
We were mother and daughter.
Though titles belied.
For you were my mother, as much as my child.
~NMG
Copyright © Nicole Glass | Year Posted 2015
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Nicole Glass Poem
Different shapes and different sizes.
Inside is where the real prize is.
Big or small, short or tall.
The outside's not the same for all.
But that is not what really counts.
Not by a ton, not by an ounce.
It doesn't matter blue or green,
Or any color in between.
You can be a boy and wear a bow,
Or be a girl who loves to mow.
If you walk with feet, or use a chair,
It does not matter here, nor there.
Our hearts are all the same, you see.
We are no different, you and me.
As long as you be the very best you,
You'll see the best in others, too!
N.M. Glass
Copyright © Nicole Glass | Year Posted 2015
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Nicole Glass Poem
I feel like I'm always crouched at the starting line.
Waiting for that gun shot, so I can take off
I have to run for my life.
It never comes, so I wait.
On edge.
Restless.
Knowing I can never relax because it could happen any time and I'd better be ready.
An eternity of anxiety.
Or is it just the trepidation of life that has me twisted inside?
Why does it always feel like I'm on borrowed time?
My life, my happiness, it all feels so fragile.
I am afraid to live.
To let my loved ones live.
I'm so terrified of how much I have to lose that I'm afraid to play the game.
Don't leave my home.
Why would I?
There are monsters out there.
Are they any scarier than this monster inside of me?
Sucking my life away slowly.
Torturously.
How do I go to battle against something intangible?
I'm sick of the butterflies.
These are not the beautiful ones.
They are dark and scary and always there just waiting to slice my insides to ribbons with the incessant beating of their wings.
I try to hide from you behind my veneer of cheer and positivity - this is where I want to live for always.
I try to- why do you want to evict me?
Why won't you just leave me alone?
Stop chewing at my nerves and my gut.
When is my sentence up?
You're exhausting me.
I have no more energy to spend, save for just existing.
I chide myself for being lazy.
For being a hermit.
Is that what I am?
Or am I just so consumed by you that I am tired of trying to stay busy to avoid you after all these years.
I have always run from you... feeling like I need a change..
Rearrange the furniture, dye my hair, get a piercing, get a pet...
Always something different hoping it will make a permanent difference in how I feel.
Changes to try to shake you... maybe you won't recognize me anymore and move on.
No one seems willing to help me battle you.
Too afraid to give me the medication that could quiet you, afraid I will get addicted.
Don't they see how much more damaging you are?
I try to smoke you out sometimes.
Every choke and burn is like a hand around your throat, taking over the battle for me so I can rest.
I can breathe again until the smoke shroud's cleared and you're back at me.
Eat at someone else's insides.
More nourishing.
There's nothing left here at this buffet.
This attack is fruitless, I'm fruitless.
You've already consumed all the best parts, you have nothing left to feed on but my tears and my fears.
Go away, and take them with you.
A doggy bag for the beast.
Copyright © Nicole Glass | Year Posted 2015
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Nicole Glass Poem
You take and you take
with your need and your greed
then you get annoyed when i am in need.
you couldn't care less, you just watch me bleed.
it's planting, in me, a resentment seed.
Then i walk around guilty, swallowing tears
cause you twist it and mash it and feed on my fears
of being someone that nobody wants
the idea eats at me, toys with me, teases and taunts
So i tell you exactly the way that i feel
and you roil and you rage and you yell and i reel
it's all the abuse without any hits
but it's painful and cruel, and i'm damaged by it.
You know that i don't like to make you upset
so you scheme and you scream and you place all your bets
on the fact that i'll cave and i'll cower and cry,
and next time i have feelings i'll keep them inside.
On the outside I smile, and say I forgive
while I look for an exit.
this is no way to live.
~NMG
Copyright © Nicole Glass | Year Posted 2015
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