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Erica Studer Poem
I suppose going through life, never knowing what goes on.
Helps keep a smile on your face, and far away from doing wrong.
Not ever knowing the cruel truth, that daddy’s not coming home.
Or with the knowledge so unfair, little sister is no more than bone.
Living day to dreadful day, full of no surprises.
Knowing that it will be the same, from night until sun rises.
Waking up to the same 3 digits, on your alarm clock.
Making sure that as you walk out the door, that you turn the lock.
Too bad that’s not how it is, and that in the real world.
Monsters deep within you, let their anger come unfurled.
Because in this existence, there is no way to escape.
You must keep your lungs breathing, so says the ruler Fate.
Many times by pills and guns, you have tried to stop it.
Wanting to fly far away, like on some careening rocket.
But again with this unfair life, we cannot just give up.
However we don’t have to take care of it, it is ours to corrupt.
Screw the parents and our friends, it’s not like they were ever there.
Break our loved ones hearts, for they never even cared.
We’re the broken children; we no longer live in denial.
We now know without a shadow of a doubt that ignorance isn’t bliss.
Knowledge is Survival
Copyright © Erica Studer | Year Posted 2010
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Erica Studer Poem
L is for the losing,
the luck if you can die.
The loneliness that never leaves,
the longing not to cry.
I is for impossible pain,
the incredible talent to remain numb.
The inevitable death due to choices we make,
the ill-concealed fear of what's to come.
F is for frustration,
at fate and what it's done.
The furious wish that you had wings to fly,
a flustered need to run.
E is for endless burning,
an eternity in hell.
The eager wish to instead go,
under enchanting heaven's spell
Copyright © Erica Studer | Year Posted 2010
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Erica Studer Poem
You never expect life, to take such a tragic turn.
You turn a spark to fire, forgetting about the burn.
People, hope, and god, attempt to stop the flame.
You refuse to listen, they're the ones to blame.
Feverish and blind, down goes another bottle.
A fiery sweet sensation, turns into tomorrow.
Ignorant godguzzling parents, worship, pray and hope.
That maybe you'll get tired enough, so they can can shove HIM down your throat.
You won't let this nonsense god, rise you up again.
So in goes another needle, and the numbness begins.
Spineless believers of the world, whatever happened to you all?
Did a big bad god tell you, that if you didn't pray you'd fall?
Explain then how...
Ripping familes apart from the ones they love
Taking children away, steeling them for above
Murding friends who never left our side
Abusing wives because with the bottle he did collide
and fathers that leave their family behind...
Could come from "The Most Loving God of All"?
Copyright © Erica Studer | Year Posted 2010
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Erica Studer Poem
Growing up with a family, in a town very small
Learning to live life to it’s fullest, even if I never had it all
It may not of been a place, where everyone wanted to be
But it was home, and it meant everything to me
After grandma left, it all went to hell
Any hopes of happiness, crumbled up and fell
Mom tried her hardest, to raise us well and good
But made mistakes, and therefore never could
I managed to keep smiling, only cause of one thing
3 very important people, that kept away the pain
Two that made me smile, no matter what went on
Friends that stayed up all night, talking until dawn
Then there was another, that I couldn’t live without
Always finding something, to talk and laugh about
Soon this small amount of bliss, ended one evening
When dad called and said, “I’ve had it, you’re packing up and leaving"
In the next week, I spent it with that one friend
The one that never left; was there right till the end
In front of the school, on my last afternoon
He came a little closer, and told me “Erica, I love you”
I shook my head, in embarrassment and fear
I was only 11, love shouldn’t be so near
I told him no, that I was moving away
“What!? Why?! Please won’t you stay?”
I turned my back, on an amazing friend
Eyes full of tears, as I saw my dad come round the bend
I got into his van, dreading my new life
Thinking it wasn’t worth it, I’d rather go through strife
But now it’s years later, and the tears still fall down
How I miss that boy, and that hellhole of a town
He’s found someone new, that said she loves him back
Something I could never say, a confidence I lack
I look back on those days, wondering how I could’ve been such a fool
Why couldn’t I have held his hand and told him
“I love you too”
Copyright © Erica Studer | Year Posted 2010
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Erica Studer Poem
There's a pressure on my ears
I can't see straight, it's a maze
There's a laugh by my side
I don't get, I'm in a daze
Don't worry little brother
I'm not sick, it's just a phase
Mommy's fingers twine through mine
Through the window, and the bars
I feel the calloused palm
And below it, brush the scars
It's alright my daughter
A year isn't very far
I'm so tired of this place
I need a beer, a bong, a toke
I need some sweet liquour
Some weed to hit or smoke
This way I don't have to think
That's better, now I get that joke
Officer I'm not drunk
I'll pass the test, and walk the line
Don't worry precious baby
Mommy's gonna be just fine
The drugs have taken over
And the darkness, starts to shine
I'm about to fade away
Friends and family, they don't care
Hey mom sorry to pry
Do you have some pills to spare
Reemember to take just one
Or badly, you will fair
I tip back the plastic bottle
And fly away, into the air
Copyright © Erica Studer | Year Posted 2010
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