Best Poems Written by Emmaline Bohn

Maladaptive Daydreaming

The flashing lights grow closer,
but the cries of my 6-year-old sister
have quieted. 

To my left, I see the car driver, my brother, 
lying motionless in the road. 
Rain hits my legs.
No. 
Blood drips down my body.
I can no longer feel my own pulse. 
Relief washes over me; 
I won’t have to face the agony of losing you. 

I think I die.
I hope I do.
But the light never ignites,
only an empty darkness
that feels like home. 

We can’t lose her either
I felt the rejuvenating pulse throughout
my whole body. 
I resurface,
broken but breathing. 

Turning onto the gravel driveway,
I wipe the tears from my face. 
Bracing to greet my parents, 
I plaster on a genuine smile
masking my sorrow. 

Taking my keys out of the ignition,
the story crumbles.
I made up the car crash 
simply to pass time. 

No glass, no screaming.
No loss, no love. 

The pain is just as real, the guilt, the confusion
of inventing a nightmare
just to escape my mundane routine
of school, work, study, sleep.

I stare at the grey house in front of me,
like it’s a stranger. 
 I wonder if I am the kind 
of person who needs tragedy 
just to believe I matter.
I never wanted to survive this quiet life,
wanted only to stop pretending
I’m okay. 

I walk inside, the beige walls welcome me.
I say hello like I haven’t imagined
my own eulogy. 
I eat dinner, talk about school
and about work.
No one knows that I die
every day in a place
 they can’t see.

Copyright © Emmaline Bohn | Year Posted 2025