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Best Poems Written by Amagyn Spencer

Below are the all-time best Amagyn Spencer poems as chosen by PoetrySoup members

Details | Amagyn Spencer Poem

since you left

at first it was unbearable i must admit
i wanted to stay home, i told my mom i felt sick
i understand now why they say time heals
it does
kinda funny though, its healing what never was
the first few weeks i’d wake up and try to get out of bed
awakened from a slumber that was only induced to silence the sirens in my head
carefully watching my steps to avoid the shards of glass scattered across the floor
leftover pieces of my heart that you forgot to pick up, the heart you said was yours
our paintings, you left those too
embarrassingly enough, for my birthday all i wanted was a text from you
eventually things got easier though, or maybe i just got distracted by the bells and whistles of life’s orchestration
you’ve given me no closure yet endless confirmation
unremitting sobs and no one to talk to
everyone was sick of hearing of my suffering, it was awful
then the hurt started to leave, and arose the confusion
how could you pretend? how wasn’t it real? was it all an illusion?
was i just another girl to you? how could my everything be nothing to you?
silly little questions that i realized i’ll never find answers to 
because i evidently don’t know your heart, i don’t even think you do
the confusion was cut short along with my livelihood when i was met with you know what
funny, it’s actually only you who knows what
do you know what?
don’t you care?
it doesn’t matter if you do anyways, evidently you lied when you said with you i could always share
now, i still see your face when i walk around my house
it scared me when i tried to remember the sound of your voice and it was faint as a mouse
yesterday i passed the photobooth we took those cute pictures in
the ones i had hanging on my wall
i took them down, but i still look at them everytime i have no one to call
i look and remember when i had you and for that i am grateful enough
i won’t lie and say i’m completely over it, because anyone could call my bluff
i am becoming empty now, i actually understand you more
things hurt less and i’m no longer frazzled when people walk out the door
i’m starting to get back to okay again, but its an ephemeral feeling
shortlived by the memories and remembrance
its mostly emptiness though
mostly nothing
just like you
i guess nothings been the same
not since you left

Details | Amagyn Spencer Poem

Lucky Broken Girl

Off the wake-up, open my eyes and start seeking some clarity.
A never-ending search for ‘someone like me’
I guess I’m rich in rarity
No doubt, I have everything a girl could ever want
Starting to feel like I’m just my mom in a different font
What could I possibly be longing for?
My life’s one big blissful whirlwind-wind of whirl- feel like I’m just a very lucky broken girl.
Who to please? God or me? I know the answer seems obvious-but everything ain’t what it seem.
If it weren’t for my mom? Who would I be?
If I had time with my dad? Would I have more security? serenity? Something to ground me and surrender me?
Who to be? What to choose? In return, will I gain for what I lose?
Lie down and close my eyes, say my prayers, pray to God for some clarity.
Why’s nobody tell you you can yearn to such severity?

Details | Amagyn Spencer Poem

if God was a woman on earth - An ode to my grandmother

my grandmother’s name is Verna

some look at her and see section 8, welfare checks, abuse and neglect

they see insufficiency, ignorant independency, a trench-condemned wreck 

no collegiate education, no high-school diploma, they see a lack of dedication 

they look in my grandmother’s eyes and with the snap of their fingers subject her to poverty, they banish her to being a pawn in their monopoly 

they gratuitously perpetuate their hate and generously project their mental state 

and to this? my grandmother smiles, she says Ladybug, don’t worry about me, they don’t know 

They don’t know that my grandmother has built diamonds of men in the rough 
she has made roses of women out of concrete
mountains move at the sound of her step
she makes even what is long lost feel kept 
her smile could make a fish breathe out of water 
i could posses no humanly title more noble than her granddaughter 
there is no greater honor that I am allowed 
no duer justice of mine than to make her proud

my grandmother sculpted my spirit with calloused hands and a heart overflowing, imbuing me with a strength born not of privilege, but of fiercely earned knowing

they don’t know about the lullabies she’s sung through thin walls, how many time she’s picked me up from my falls, and more importantly how she doesn’t keep count 

her motherhood, a tapestry woven with threads of sacrifice and strands of grace, a masterpiece unseen by eyes that only value pedigree and place

my grandmother has raised generations of excellence. don’t believe me? just open your eyes-you never met a woman so sagacious-so wise-so gracious-even with my words you couldn’t surmise 

I’m talking about a charisma you wouldn’t believe, a resilience you couldn’t conceive, a wit you could never deceive, a love you wouldn’t know how to receive, 

if i died and said I never knew unconditional love, I would be a bold-faced lie 
i think my grandma would raise up out her grave and set the record straight with a fire burning in her eye 

hell, call it blasphemy but I think my grandmother’s touch could make a blind man see
her soul breaking chains and setting lives free

my grandmother’s name is Verna 

and if God was a woman on earth, then I’ve been a disciple since birth

Details | Amagyn Spencer Poem

My life is like a string

my life is like a string
being stitched together and coming undone
being stitched together and coming undone
my heart is like a rainstorm 
the pitter-patter of my soul filled of love soliloquies unsung 
filled of promises broken and repeated and rerun
and broken again
and again 
my life is like a string being stitched together and coming undone
being stitched together and coming undone
filled of triumphs and awards and “Bug, I’m so proud of you” 
and crushed spirits disguised as “fun” and “Am’Agyn look what you’ve done” and look who you’ve become and look what you all have forced me to be 
my life is like a string being stitched together and coming undone 
being stitched together and coming undone
my face is like a quilt weaved in relationship but laced in regret but reverenced with love
the smile of my mom and the rest of my dad 
whose absence I swear doesn’t affect me but sometimes I wonder if with him id be less sad
if with him that first heartbreak wouldn’t have broken me and left me me feeling more alone than had 
more hurt than healed 
more hated than held 
My life is like a string being stitched together and coming undone
Being stitched together and coming undone 
and to the first boy I loved i still whisper your name in every breath 
because I meant it when I said until apart does us death 
My life is like a string being stitched together and coming undone 
Being stitched together and coming undone 
Highly decorated, often imitated, never duplicated, still and yet they say it’s luck- Am’Agyn Nae Spencer
Unforgettable, remarkable, and always “the one” 
yet and still bursting at the seams, seeping with yearning, a pine that could leave you foaming at the mouth, a pain that you wouldn’t believe until it poured out
or until its weaving weakens 
like a stubborn string
being stitched together and coming undone 
being stitched together and coming undone

Details | Amagyn Spencer Poem

leave easy

i am starting to learn that I am rather easy to leave 
it has always confused me, considering I give with every ounce of me
still I am the one who has to grieve 
loving people from the deepest depths of my soul 
giving everything I’ve got in attempts to make them feel whole
maybe breaking me apart puts them back together and if so? 
smash me into 1,000 pieces, I guess I’ll reap what I sow
nobody’s ever left claw marks on me
I hope you know if you would’ve dug into me, I would’ve cherished the scars
he hate me like I love him 
she hurt me like I healed her
easy to leave
desperate for someone to stay