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Sharon Nyambowo Poem
I can close my eyes,
It's weird how still you are the last thought on mind.
I say, 'you and me'
I say, ' still with you'
It's weird how I carry your name forward each and every passing day
Despite all conflicts
Most precious
I was an emotional high;
'Emotional high,' I said
My words not yours
Something you couldn't get off without experiencing
Whatever love
It's already done and done
Your grand scheme of plans,
Did it all work out,
Most precious?
Were you land?
Were you ground?
Were you earth?
Were you stone?
Were you pillar?
Most precious
When you left love,
It felt like the earth had crumpled from underneath my feet
No footing
No ground
No standing
Nothing to grasp much less hold
Love you were cruel
Most precious
I stood there on nothing
Cry, I cried
Weep, I wept
Thought and contemplated
Scared to death,
Love was I going to fall?
After all most precious you were still precious
Probably still are
Probably will still be
Most precious
Love I realised,
You were the ocean,
And underneath you I drowned unaware.
You were gravity,
And under you I became grounded
Without you, most precious
From under I came
Ashore I arrived
Love, I was lighter even.
Copyright © Sharon Nyambowo | Year Posted 2022
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Sharon Nyambowo Poem
The thought of me that came into your mind,
It grew;
It blossomed;
You thwarted it;
Hopefully you are letting it wilt and die.
I do not want to ignite old flames.
I want to believe your words were true;
After all you said them,
But my mind acts as if it has a mind of its own.
It's been months but still it will not hear the end of it.
These feelings are beginning to feel disgusting;
I hope they die.
I tell myself I need space;
Space away from you;
Honey believe me, I only believe that for a while;
Then I begin to look for you;
The you I know I will never find.
I get glad when you don't show;
When you neither call nor text;
Because if you as so much turn your head I fear I might clutch onto you;
So I hope this dies.
Then I dream of you;
You are just next to me;
You talk a lot but it feels like silence;
I smile at you;
You peak at me once or thrice,
I am reminded of our old days;
When you used to care.
I feel comforted at the same time I feel sadness
Is this what it means to be delusional?
I hope it dies
I know I love you;
I know I miss you;
I know I yearn for you;
I know I search for you;
But I can no longer differentiate between your truths and your lies;
I know my truth but I don't know what to do with it;
So I hope it all dies
Copyright © Sharon Nyambowo | Year Posted 2022
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Sharon Nyambowo Poem
Just like always
Smart people wouldn't trod on the paths she had trodden;
Wise people wouldn't be in the predicaments she always found herself in.
She offers no words of condolences;
Neither any words of repentance;
Not even a word of remorse.
Why would she feel apologetic to anyone;
When the gravest sins she committed to herself?
Why does she live so foolishly?
How pathetic
Nothing phases her;
She is neither perturbed or frightened.
There is nothing to say or explain;
Tell me what the hell has she become?
Soon she will return from underneath her rock;
She will great you with a smile,
And won't even try to hide.
She will forgive herself;
Letting you go like she has let many go before you;
Not with so much tears but maybe a frown on her face;
Just like always.
Just like always she will bury you underneath the many ghosts that haunt her;
And probably the many more she will continue to make.
She will give herself a pet on the back;
Scavenge for any lessons learnt;
Even if the losses outweigh the gains.
But don't be mistaken,
Though the demons seem awfully frightening,
She will carry on forward each and every day,
She won't shut down her doors;
Just like always
Copyright © Sharon Nyambowo | Year Posted 2022
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Sharon Nyambowo Poem
It's so hard not to miss you
It's not because there is a little less of me without you
Rather because with every beat of every second,
You resonated me
I never had to be frightful
I could have easily told you all things
Like how our neighbor died just yesterday
And how it made me sad
How I wondered how it will be like for the wife
I was never frightful of your reprimand
There are lot of times I try to imagine what you would say
I imagine your thoughts
I imagine the look on your face at some realizations
It's the thing that makes it hard not to miss you
And you would have answered me already by now
You were always ahead of my feelings
I never had to wait for you
You did be there waiting
And I didn't have to fret about doing too much
Because you were doing it with me
There was never really doubt in my mind
Guess I was a little too excited
Couldn't see it till I lost you
That there was no feelings for me
I did something I told myself never to do
I overstated my value in your life
Even though I didn't exetempt myself from the universe you wanted to massacre
I guess I was a little too conceited
Because we worked so well
According to me, I guess
You will remain my very best
Makes me kind of doubtful of everything else
Because if you and me could fall
What exactly is it, that is supposed to stand
Maybe I never really saw you at all
Copyright © Sharon Nyambowo | Year Posted 2022
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Sharon Nyambowo Poem
Blank;
I spent my days talking a lot;
I tell a lot of things about myself,
I tell a lot of things about my dad, my mom, my brother, my sister;
At the end of it all, I ask myself why.
Some days I can feel myself bearing down upon her;
She too deserves an attending ear;
Who listens without pardon;
Who asks about her;
What she has been through;
What she is going through;
How she spends her days;
That much I know;
Some days I try;
Some days well, I let myself be.
I know there is a truth I am running away from;
A truth I have to face every time I shut my mouth;
I trying to make myself matter in the wrong way;
He is no longer here;
Him who accepted my counterfeit gold,
And treated it like real gold.
Everything feels blank and stale;
I somehow disappear;
I feel like there is no longer a me,
But I can't go back to that gutter;
I have shunned it long ago.
There is a lot I don't know;
A lot I don't understand;
Things I wish I had answers to;
I keep meeting these interesting people;
But I can't commune my thoughts;
I am at this beautiful place;
I know I could have enjoyed it more;
If he had decided to stay by my side a little more;
It's forever raining nowadays, but because there is no you I don't enjoy it as much
Copyright © Sharon Nyambowo | Year Posted 2022
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Sharon Nyambowo Poem
Always been a fool for love;
Not once have I been in love and have it end well;
There was always a twist,
And you are probably my worst choice.
But why start thinking now?
Am I even capable of thought?
So I heard it's a very thin line between hopeful and stupidity.
Say, you and I are both aware;
There is something special between us.
Say you don't know what it is;
Is that why you think you are obsessed with me?
Say, I don't know about that,
But if you were really obsessed;
I think there did be less thinking involved.
You say soulmates perhaps;
Well I ain't sure about that either;
How many supposed soulmates is one supposed to have;
I did think one is enough;
There has to be a limit to idiocies;
But I agree,
There must be a pull of souls between us,
That did explain a lot.
Talk about loyalty;
You are amongst the few I actually like;
Amongst the few I can genuinely love;
I imagine we can be happy for a while;
After all you are the only one that has ever embraced me so tightly;
So I am a fool for love;
And that's why I believe you are genuine with me.
Copyright © Sharon Nyambowo | Year Posted 2022
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Sharon Nyambowo Poem
I said that I was a believer of love;
That I believed in you and I.
You said that worried you.
I asked, "why?"
You asked, "what if someone comes along who loves you better than I?"
"Does such a thing exist?" I asked you; with my head squared inquisitively with a small smile on my face;
You looked at me and I continued, " because if it does I want to love you best. You love me just right, I don't need better love; all I need is you "
Copyright © Sharon Nyambowo | Year Posted 2022
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Sharon Nyambowo Poem
There is nothing that beats that time
When I lay down that bed and close my eyes
I might have not done it well
Heck, I might not have done it at all
But whatever, it means I am getting rest
There is nothing that beats that moment
When every conscious thought escapes me
That feeling is just so freeing
I forget everything
I forget even myself
I am held up to nothing
There is nothing that beats the silence of the night
It becomes me
I don't have to wake for anything
There is nothing that beats early morning silence
When everything is yet asleep
Sure I am hurt a little
But with a cup of tea in one hand
And a book in the other hand
Trust me, I don't want to be going anywhere today
Copyright © Sharon Nyambowo | Year Posted 2022
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Sharon Nyambowo Poem
His looks and physique,
Add on to that someone else's mind and brains,
I am sure it will be like salt to the season-less.
Add to all that someone else's generosity,
It will be like spice to the spice-less;
And after all that I am sure I did get the perfect man,
The man of my dreams.
They say women nowadays want everything
But how can we not
After-all its everything
I mean, would you not?
Actually, do you not?
The mind is still caught up in the 90's,
Where you get to wait for the man
He did come to you
Bring you niceties plus
And tell you sweet-nothings
And actually dare to lie to you.
Nowadays he doesn't wash,
He will wait to see you with the nights drool hanging on his cheeks
His hair unkempt
Smelling like urine and sweat
Waiting to bring you into his loving embrace
Slither his tongue down your throat
And indulge himself.
The people of today,
The boys now call the women gold diggers,
They say they are lose and demanding,
They say women lack submission,
I heard something along the lines princess syndrome.
The girls say the man are poor,
They say the boys weak,
They say the men are women,
And women need men too.
Everyone has become so men.
They say there in no submission without respect
You can't be respected if you aren't alpha.
They say there is no price without effort.
But then you will hear something about 50-50,
It's called a partnership now.
But apparently that only counts when it's monetary.
There is way too much talk,
Too much talk about the feminine and masculine
Too much talk about the toxic and the non toxic
It's a global pandemic
Somehow it just can't stick.
It's too much work to get a relationship,
Too much work to keep it.
Then there are those of us who just have it easy,
They are proud and wonder what the fuss is all about,
They are amongst the few who aren't sick.
They will tell you there is no relationship without a hiccup
They will tell you life has no formula.
Then there is your mother waiting patiently for the day of the bride price
She isn't saying anything now
But you know the kind of silence that happens before a storm;
Before she starts incessantly praying
Going to the prophets and traditional healers
Testifying there is this aunt who held you when you were young,
Surely she must have done something
Because how can you be unmarried.
And here is you all the while thinking
Though we live in a community,
Is it so wrong to be alone.
It's a muddle,
It's a jungle,
Especially when you know it so well,
You got a lousy BF.
Copyright © Sharon Nyambowo | Year Posted 2023
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Sharon Nyambowo Poem
First there was you
Beautiful, full of hope and courage.
You stood there at the very edge of the cliff,
Breaking out...
Far beyond you was me,
I looked at you; you looked at me;
I realised you were my own.
In your eyes I could see a reflection of who I was,
And who I was going to be.
I knew if I spoke you could decipher my foreign language
You'd relieve angst.
I never had to explain.
I looked at you;
I saw you;
I recognised you.
I perceived the tears you had at the corner of your eyes;
Even when your mouth did nothing but smile.
I realised the bitterness in your laughter;
The weight in your wings;
Even if you were flying much higher.
I realised the coldness in your gentle but few words.
You were painting the world dark,
All of it was nothing but bleak;
Even though you wished to see light.
But honey you and I are the same
So different but yet so alike
Help, is all you wanted
"Don't fall,"
Stare at me and beyond me...
I will reach out to you
And you'll become my world
At the very edge of your Cliff
Copyright © Sharon Nyambowo | Year Posted 2022
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