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Deasia Luster Poem
Fresh out fresh in *snap*
just like that
Regrets, worry’s, nd fear’s
Fall at the drop of a hat
MOON LIT
Hearts and weary soul
The have done the have nots, the cant waits, the "wonder what the future holds"
The once vivid now abandoned and cold
MOON LIT
The “come back” the “i need you” the “why’d you have to go”
MOON LIT
A path only followed by those who were too eager to be told no
MOON LIT
Cried the grieving loved ones
MOON LIT
Ready, Set, Fire
MOON LIT
Persuaded by desire
MOON LIT
You’d have to see it to believe it,but believing does not amount.
You’d have to feel it, you’d have to breath it just to begin to stomach what it was about
MOON LIT
The path which I can not ponder
2 roads ahead, which to take I can only wonder
MOON LIT
A life but not living,
MOON LIT
Going but not willing
MOON LIT
A path in which I can not follow, was the road too narrow, i had imagined them wide
MOON LIT
Guiding you to the great one, the one with almighty pride
MOON LIT
Walking above for they have been deprived of their graceful destiny
READY SET FIRE!! DOWN GOES PLENTY
MOON LIT
“Come back” “I love you” “ it is you that i need” for I am just the soil, hopelessly waiting for you to plant your seed
Pain Agony , a loss of words, yet you follow the moonlight like a flock of starling bird
MOON LIT
To hear you say “don’t wait up”
Lonely nor alone, for I am walking on the moonlit path, that is slowly but surely guiding me home.
Copyright © Deasia Luster | Year Posted 2021
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Deasia Luster Poem
What if I told sunset about the way you kissed me
What if I told sunset about the way you make me feel
What if I told sunset about how you heal my damaged soul,warm my heart and kept me from the cold
What if I told sunset about you
What if there was a secret, a little white lie
Would you stay,
what if I told sunset about how the sight of you pulls the blush out of my face
But what if I was different, too unique in ones time, what if I was me but not me inside my mind
what if when I say it you decide to walk away, yet my pride is too high to ask for you to stay
What if I told you I need you! For I have become addicted. For I was once a lost soul that you found and lifted
What if I WALKED down the moonlit path, and never FOUND my way
What if the feelings that we experienced had now gon astray
What if it was that little white lie that tears us apart, what if once I told you, you released me from your heart
For one could only imagine what you do to me, but what if once were finally happy you find out and flee
For my love has grew so much
This connection I know you feel it too
What if you stayed
What if you weren't afraid
What if I told sunset about you
Copyright © Deasia Luster | Year Posted 2021
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Deasia Luster Poem
As I lay in full moons glow
Pining for sunrise too take it’s turn
I’m trapped in the body of a person I don’t know
and with every breath I take it burns
My temporary happiness fueled my desire
A desire that’ll possibly go away with time
I sit yearning with no one left to call on
and its no one’s fault but mine
Singing the pain from my battered soul
my temporary happiness was my only peace through the grime
There is no friendship In Pain
There’s no love when winters comes a creeping around the courts
There’s no reason to reconcile there’s nothing I would gain
So I take my retched thought;throw them in the pile and wait to be a corpse.
I prepared my tears and perform my pain openly in front of the crowd
then I wipe my eyes lean back my head and wait until I’m covered in a shroud.
You took the first “out” you saw and I understand I can’t say I blame you
Tho through thick and thin I would’ve been by your side; I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t ashamed of you
Even those on your side talk to the walls that shut you out
Tho you trust their loyalty even tho they’ve given you reason for doubt
Friendship is a double sided game
There’s nobody to blame except there is and the blame goes on you…except I love you so much and the truth is for you there’s nothing I wouldn’t do.
My temporary gain in love and happiness was built on nothing but a lie
My temporary pain wasn’t pain at all if anything for a moment it was paradise
These temptations are to blame The yearning and desire for they have latched onto me like a parasite
And As I lay Wishing I had refrained; i close my eyes and wait for night
Tho When I open my eyes all I can see is my reflection in the paradisiacal white
I scream in silence
For my mind is a void, I’m trapped in my thoughts and something has taken control over my life
Copyright © Deasia Luster | Year Posted 2022
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Deasia Luster Poem
glimmering, glistening , the stars in this night sky
Oh they can’t, oh they can’t. They can’t Compare to these bright city lights
The silent screaming and pain can’t compare to these comfortable nights
When the darkness takes over and the stars so far away ;yet distinctive in my eyes
Tho the beauty in those are nothing compared to the colors in my mind
My lies fall towards your lingering eyes
these pathetic screams these bright city lights
Remixing;delusion for simple human gaze
Identity lost, personality stolen, painted vividly upon my face
Oh the way you beat me with your emotions
Oh it can’t compare, can’t compare it can’t compare to when you hold me tight
Oh the pangs from the hunger so well deserved still can’t get my body right
The butterflies ate from quick glances ripping out of my spine
the mesmerizing love given yet not earner these bright city lights
as the dimness on my mind contrast your colorful, beauty-filled mind
I watch your lingering judgment filled eyes as they take ahold of mine
The beating up of one’s self
The shame for a meal eaten and thrown up later
These city lights watch as I beg for help
these city lights are my savior
From butterfly so social
To flowers planted within walls
From infatuation to deep thoughts reserved for later
to the loss of motion,
You watching as I crawl
Crawl into my position as a floorgazer
These bright yellow-gold-silver lights brighten up this happy town
More than the smiles of the loveless and lost
More than the switches inside where one
Lies safe and sound
these bright city lights seen free of cost
these bright city lights are the only thing keeping me around
Copyright © Deasia Luster | Year Posted 2022
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Deasia Luster Poem
it’s that time of year again.. that time
were people start to notice I need help
Around this time of year I get so caught up loving you I forget to love myself
My desires for tomorrow; fueled by the pain of yesterday?anhedonia has gotten the best
me.. it has taken my personality away.
Yet I tend to say I’m ok out loud, to remind myself thats what I should be
Idiotic and delusional, For I’m not ok, I can’t be ok, and I haven’t been ok since you left me.
I haven’t been okay since my innocence was snatched.
I haven’t been okay since I pleaded for it back.
I haven’t been okay since I lost my ability to speak!
I haven’t been okay since I forgot the feeling of free.
It’s killing me how you can go on and act like I was never there
It’s killing me how you can go and find love elsewhere
I have found peace in the poison that was forced into my veins
And as I lay down, body numb, tears trickling down my cheek I find peace in the pain
I’ve found peace in the flirt even tho I’ll never be able to commit the act
I’ve found peace in my hurt, because I know I can’t get my innocence back
around this time of year These Scratches,slight scars, burns, cuts , remind me that I can still feel.
The sight of my covered scars reminds me that it will in fact heal
I am in fact human; I am in fact real
if I had it in me I could lift up my hands.. and rejoice maybe?? cuz I’m still here and I’m still alive strong and free! Tho I’m not dead; this isn’t my body and I’m not me.
Around this time of year
love is the only thing keeping me sane
It’s the only thing that’s able to tame , tame the darkness, my thoughts and help me put on a happy face
This darkness tho it’s my home it isn’t a place rather a feeling I’d learned to endure.
This darkness swarmed around my soul, had I known the darkness was me
This darkness stripped me of all my aspirations; leaving me desiring only being freed.
The thoughts of the enemy have tainted my mind for. I Thought my pain was a common pain amongst the
I thought my pain was a pain everyone had or will see
I thought these feelings crossed every persons mind I thought we all begged to be Freed
Till I talked to those with desires and hopes and realized my pain was only common to me
Around this time of year I make the decision “to do” or “to not”, around this time of year I struggle to find a spot in the earths summer sun and windy winds. Around this time of year is when the pain begins.
Copyright © Deasia Luster | Year Posted 2022
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Deasia Luster Poem
A soft whisper
a buzz like bumble
singing springs songs quietly
Her songs I shall mumble
Once I lay neatly my body
Please do not disinter
for I shall sing loudly springs songs
Once I make it out of winter
Flowers lead to sleep
as sleeps fuels my pain
I seep into this darkness
with only winter to blame
Sitting in silence
Winter on my mind
That painful abyss
only a matter of time
Before the land of the free lay riddled in depth
Starting with spring
Ending with death
Starting with love
The seasons will change
the fall flowers will bloom
that I know
today it shall rain
Tomorrow it will snow
Today you will witness my glorious suicide
Tomorrow you shall act as if we were in love
Today springs showers deem me crucified
Tomorrow winter shall lift me above
I’ve waited to long for springs farewell
So I shall push the seasons myself
I shall Push with my songs
pain
Pride
& Heart
I shall push with my death.
Copyright © Deasia Luster | Year Posted 2022
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Deasia Luster Poem
Time passes, yet ticking remains the same,
progression becomes wistful dream
Broken clocks, this pattern is pain
This Pattern is heartbreak and pensive screams
Repetition drains me , the gaining and losing
Has stripped me bare
Perseverance is all I can offer you, tho to this pattern I’ve become aware
Of the temporary “forever loves” of the short lived peace
That after you hold me close like clockwork you will release
Release me back into plaintive truth
Release me back to where I was before you
Release me into the dark room to cry
Release me into internal doom to die
adolescence leaves, Yet ticking remains the same
Desire dries up, and love falls short
Tho I can’t figure out if I am to blame
Or if these broken clocks simply distort
My mind.
Into following these patterns, into not allowing me peace
Into only loving temporary
The lack of commonality or compatibility
Is it these broken clocks?. or it it me?
Tho like clockwork i will realize that there is no love only a desire that will eventually fade
A desire to be caressed a desire to be held
We’ll realize that infatuation tricked us, we fell subject to its lies and that we’ll both need help
Like clockwork our day will soon end For it is only 1 and yet infatuation prevails
And Like broken clocks the pattern of acknowledging our “love” is only hope will
Leave us frail
Tho for now we’ll watch the ticking clocks well study their patterns and hope for something
New
Tho we both know there’s consistency within the ticking we both know this is clockwork
We both know this is the truth
Copyright © Deasia Luster | Year Posted 2023
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Deasia Luster Poem
soul searching-pondering for someone to amount
To the heart now broken-broken into so many pieces we can’t even count.
Your beauty is undeniable tho it seems your eyes deceive u
you settle for the worst you let your heart not your head lead you.
your pain so bottled up.. tho you wear this lively persona proudly
Oh those walls you have built, please let them down when you are around me.
If you say you don’t see it , then your eyes have deceived you. I see every bit of pain hiding behind that picture painted in the most lovely shades
you say that you are lacking tho I do not believe u
You’re prodigy, magnificent,godly, lacking only the praise.
You are lonely, so you settle for those who use you for personal gain.
you are roaming but you have accepted this lifestyle you have accepted this pain
Tho if you let me I will break this cycle, I will help you experience a world where love is mutual and pain is astray
where the thoughts of personal gain are so far away. Where we can live in the moment. A moment in time where my heart will hold your pain and your eyes hold mine.
Where there is no romance, just tears and cheer.
where that wall built up will no longer exist here.
Your eyes have deceived you for when I look at you I see a boy so beautiful it blinds mine
your mind has deceived you for making you think you are running out of time.
We are both so young tho i can shoulder our pain, I can reciprocate the care you have given me in this wretched gray world.
Comfort,trust, and vulnerability, many things deserved I’m willing to give to thee
Tho Your personality has left me at a loss for words
I’d never met someone so broken but whole
I’d never met someone so trapped but free
I’d never met someone so like me.
Your eyes have deceived you along with your mind, your heart, and those you keep near
For when I look at your lonely silhouette I want to be nowhere but here.
Your eyes have deceived you for you are the most beautiful human to ever steps into my gaze
But we shall punish those deceitful eyes until you realize your glory and get your rightfully deserved praise
Copyright © Deasia Luster | Year Posted 2022
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Deasia Luster Poem
I am death I am freedom I am crying on my knees
I see glory I see sunlight I see him as I kneel down and plead
He was here knocking at my wall
Had I known life was paradise i would’ve given it my all
Had I known love was temporary I would’ve averted my gaze
Had I experienced the feeling’s of amazement I would’ve waited out my days
Had I known death was paradise I wouldn’t have wished it away
Had I known paradise was pain I wouldn’t have pleaded it to stay
Had i known death would come a knocking I would have swung opened my door
Had I known that this was my paradise I would have thrown all my worries against the floor
Had I known I was living in euphoria I wouldn’t have minded your gore
Had I known I was alive I would have lived my life a little more
Tho I knew it was coming it
Didn’t prepare me for the fact that I will love him after seeing his wrong
It didn’t prepare me for the paradise that speaks to me through their songs
It’s
Sparkling,glitter, crystals the paradise I signed up for
Peace and pain revoked is the paradise that I adore
Had I known wynter had crept up I wouldn’t have waited till dawn
Had I known I was pining for sleep I wouldn’t have ignored my yawn
Had I known this was the “great paradise”
I would have closed my eyes so long ago.
Yet when I asked you if this was the climax of my life and you told me no
Had I known death was life I would have peacefully went to sleep
Though for now I will sit in my paradise yearning to be freed
Copyright © Deasia Luster | Year Posted 2021
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Deasia Luster Poem
Underneath our sins/ they call us sinners
Underneath our pride???underneath our happiness? Buried within society? We heard them shout?
We heard them shout at the top of their lungs. We heard them shout where we were going and when we were going there. We heard them call us “Devils.
“Devils”??How could we be devils?? We were only just alive. We didn't choose to be this way, it just happened like this. We went to the venues for confession but they only shamed us more. They shamed us for coming clean, they humiliated us, kicked us out and closed the door.
-So what now. Where will we go? It's ok, forget about it, pack your bag and put on a smile. We're leaving but we'll come back after a while. Underneath my strong assertive exterior there is a person scared that they have to go. A person that regrets ever letting the world know. A person that took advice from someone living on the same planet yet a different world .
We heard them shout at the top of their lungs. We heard them shout that sooner or later we would have to stop this sin. We heard them call us miscreants. MIscreants?? As in criminals?? What have we done to be classified as such?? As if me expressing my love through a touch is enough to make me into an animal. One deserving of being put into a kennel. Are those who love normal recipients?? Are they the ones worthy?? Does their normal make them better? Does their “holy” mean they’re greater? They shout loudly at the breaker. And their loud shouts grow prouder.
-Underneath that voice shouting lies a girl not so much girl buried within society. Slowly dying to make a break, slowly crawling to catch a breath. Underneath her happiness lies the lies that she hides from the world as she tries to be the best girl in it. Underneath her pride lies a girl that strives to reach and meet the terms of their holy but dries out and dies.
-Underneath their “HOLY”.
They call us villains.
We hear them shouting.
We bear with the pain and the shame… we pack our bags and turn our backs….desperate for the day they will understand our pain and welcome us back
I express my pain loudly yet not trying to provoke thee
They ignore my yells proudly while singing the songs of their holy
Copyright © Deasia Luster | Year Posted 2021
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