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Lyra Pendragon Poem
I do not want to light this candle this night
yet I must light this candle
I light this candle with a heavy heart
and wish this candle was brighter
as I wish everything was
as I hold this candle for you
it feels so heavy
but looking at it
makes everything brighter
even for just an instant
that instant we all have and need
as I watch this candle go out
I know that while I can no longer
see the flame of life
I feel like I have lost its light
and yet I know that flame
that eternal energy
Is still somewhere
(if you need proof, please see the the first law of thermodynamics and study entropy
I leave you now with this because I have to pee)
Copyright © Lyra Pendragon | Year Posted 2019
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Lyra Pendragon Poem
As Commander of the weird
Member of the phurst church of phun
An ordained member I am father and I am mother
Of the rubber chicken
Juggled between one George Bush and the other
Between camps, I break my foot,
They threw me up, North
I made some friends and begged
To be dragged around
In a wheel barrow or
A Greyhound after I stole the eighty bucks
Or eight hundred dollars for one way
Not knowing the way back
Stealing a thick book from a library in Oakland
I wasn’t running away
Snuck out the back door
To be smuggled southward in a van
Insulting a beautiful Cambodian woman in a yurt
That was not my yurt but someone else’s
Rolling around the desert with a mushroom man
Showing my butt for photographs just for a laugh
Hot Springs pool up we drive a million miles in a day
Naked women with strings show uteral decay
It’s ok, the sulfurous water cools as it moves downstream
Riding a UFO back to into the desert sands
We break into a dark secluded box
I am an elf, we know the task at hand
Exploring, we find a family is lost
So we show them the way out
Into a raging sandstorm we jump 2 stories down
Into the midst of another labyrinth
Which is much brighter
Full of people talking too loud
We walk around for the rest of the first night
Copyright © Lyra Pendragon | Year Posted 2019
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Lyra Pendragon Poem
Learning a heart beats makes life go fast
My heart beats twice as fast as you think
and half as fast as I remember
When the rainbow came out
over my grandmother's wet face
in the rain in a crowd
of nervous spectators
I graduated again
under the gazing admiration of
a bunch of sappy critics
also known as my family
I was sad and embarrased
only to realize that
they were amazed and overjoyed
I did not want to be here
Neither did my grandmother
and my husband and other mom
got drunk to celebrate
a toast to my success at the office
When my dad so proud
of my developmental growth
and my aunt were finally adults
we stood there together but yet
still seperated by the rain and tears
under the rainbow with a pulse
The President asked us to be silent
for a pulse
a beat
another raindrop
another moment of sadness
and rain and tears were shed for a breath
a somber graduation day indeed
we stood in solidarity
Always the pulse of life is strong
even when our grandfathers' hearts break
when we are strangers we stand together
in solidarity.
we cried and laughed and cheered
under the rainbow
and I learn much from all who die
with peace and love and unity
I remain ever gratefully yours
A graduate
Copyright © Lyra Pendragon | Year Posted 2021
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Lyra Pendragon Poem
Riding the bus to school past an ugly reminder
the tattered trailers next to a construction site
I imagine the way it used to be
a house
across from a dozen shattered trailers with little heat
no water usually but electricity
visiting mom was a treat
Dad would not refuse to drop me off
at her trailer with my pet rat
rad dee louise, ratty louise mom called him
she loved him so I let her have him
mom had friends over all the time
this tattered trailer held them while
I watched and smelled the perfume
watched her glow red and crystallize with 2 grown men
then dad picked me up for the night
next time a man drove up to the lot
he rolled down the window and I ran up
we talked and I must have been smart
because he remembered me and drove off
she wanted to talk about the spies
the eyes in the trees that were watching her
I ate the crystals she gave me saying
these are cow grass, they put the cows to sleep
I did not sleep
she lectured me
about all the terrible things that others
could do to me or had done to others
so I went outside and built a fire
that fire lasted through the night
the coals were most amazing things
I'd ever seen
I stared into their eyes
keep them alive and nothing else mattered
She came storming out of the tattered trailer
after midnight or just before dawn I dont know
screaming
I'm being electrocuted! she said
tired, I wondered why she felt that way
she jumped into a tree and sat their shaking
I tried to comfort her but she was on fire
I saw that, tried to leave in vain
she kept me close and dragged me
to the battered trailer again
she pulled me from place to place
around the compound in the dawn
the fire coals were cold and so was I
wanted to sleep but she kept saying
she was being electrocuted
waking up I wandered to find the sheriff
shaking her awake and taking her away
they took me too
to the dock where the van was
where my dad was gone
I told them he was teaching which was true
so I woke up alone next to the payphone
and crawled into bed in the van
I didn't tell my dad
Copyright © Lyra Pendragon | Year Posted 2019
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Lyra Pendragon Poem
Your words rhyme
They're slow in time
You know how to bust a rap
I wasn't referring to that
I mean what art you truly have
which makes others really glad?
Copyright © Lyra Pendragon | Year Posted 2019
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Lyra Pendragon Poem
pus oozes from the swollen gum near my cheek
the pain is not enough to convince me
"it's mostly oxygen" they cry
covering my face with laughing gas
it doesn't work, I am still awake
"your appointment is at 3" they say
the 5 o clock hour rolls around
"are you ready yet?" they ask
I keep my mouth shut tight
Mom is with me this time
frustrated because dad is done
it's the first time she stood up
since I was in kindergarten
they offer me a tour of the room
wrestling with 3 nurses and a dentist
one blocks the door as I make a mad dash
holding me down ripping my sweater off
I know I'm in for it
screaming only makes it hurt worse
"count down from one hundred" 99 ... 98
Ketamine with no IV is fast
I wake up dreaming in the truck
"you looked dead to me"
my mother says as I lay on the couch
Watching the tapestry of horses
"I'm speaking through the horses mouths"
I say, with the horses trotting around
their mouths move as they graze and drink
out of the pond that is in our living room
I quite like being knocked out.
Copyright © Lyra Pendragon | Year Posted 2019
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Lyra Pendragon Poem
I met Lydia when I needed a friend
She was always quiet, and hid under the bed
I learned how to watch what would happen from her.
I was always happy to see a familiar face
Coming through the door or window frame
Never to stay for long, just to let me know she was there
Babs died and at Thanksgiving Harriett told me
About her closest friend of twenty three
Who I would always be two years older for
Every year I lived, I heard the voices
Of the women and the familiars
Who watched after me with care.
Copyright © Lyra Pendragon | Year Posted 2019
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Lyra Pendragon Poem
Spring thaw brings her out of hibernation
She’s looking for a burrow to call home
To build cups of nectar near a mountain
She is a queen, and more than just a drone.
Black fur, and yellow cover their bodies
As they fly to all the wild flowers
The rainbow colored bird, likes eating bees
The brown bear, an entire nest devours
They fly no more when summer season dies
After workers hatch, the queens homebound
They murder her after all the eggs lie
Little queens, hiding til spring underground.
One of them will wake up cold and yawning
Finding new flowers to taste in the dawn
Copyright © Lyra Pendragon | Year Posted 2019
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Lyra Pendragon Poem
I sat under a cedar tree,
Listening to the snow fall softly as it melted
The birds, many different kinds
Singing to each other.
The freeway roared softly but was interrupting
Flirting fleeting tweets of the robins.
I cried gently to myself thinking, how beautiful
the soft white snow was when it could be red
Copyright © Lyra Pendragon | Year Posted 2019
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Lyra Pendragon Poem
MILK
He was a chubby boy who liked to bully me
I had a thing for bullies ; they only hit me one at a time
He lived further away than I was near the park
and near the apartments my mom liked to stay after dark
walking home one day I told him I liked milk
this delighted him and mom was gone
from the apartment where he stayed
and I sat with him on his bed
when his mom came home I jumped up
he pulled his pants on as his mother came
through the door I ran out and as I passed
she proclaimed to him you're not allowed
to have any girls in the house!
SOAP
going to visit my mom in the same apartments
near the park I went to visit before
I watched my mom get high with another woman
I wanted to leave even though I missed my mom
I told her I knew the kid downstairs, I wanted to leave
but mom's friend said don't go to him
he is a creep and a criminal, he preys on kids
my age, I had already seen him
these adults were much more scary
I tried to leave but with no success
I called mom out for doing meth
we fought on the carpet she pinned me down
she dragged me across the ground
yelling I'll wash your mouth out with soap
but I did not give up hope
I smashed her against the counter
of the kitchen as she tried to shove me
into the bathroom, ran out the door
and I didn't see the bully
but just ran through the park back home.
Copyright © Lyra Pendragon | Year Posted 2019
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