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Brian Rusch Poem
Somewhere I am not
As is my memory... not
If not there, then where?
When I was eighteen
Going to change the world
My world at least...
That hook went missing
Place is changed too, for good
As Time... slipped the knot.
We’ll see if I see
Acting out what has happened
Still to see, or saw.…
Different wholes…
Time only allowing me
To play minor parts.
Care I any more
To be ever more worthy?
For age has changed me.
Truths were more hidden
Eighteen should come much later
Was quick passage planned?
Copyright © Brian Rusch | Year Posted 2024
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Brian Rusch Poem
I lay so seemingly far away from here
In the sleeping bag of my dreams
Where ever do I come from
Going exactly where, I wonder
Especially seeing nothing... is
As was thought it to be seen.
Chilled, wrapped in safety blankets
Of imprinted thoughts, and memories known
Mansions many, waiting
Through sleepy mind’s open door
Ready for re-visiting, enter free
As free to roam.
___*___
Release I say!
Yes, release this sad Soul’s connection
For more forward fancy flights.
So off again, I can go again
Into unknown, crazy, enlightened newer places
Leaving here Moon guarding
Another peaceful, wintry night.
Knowing well, in the end
I will have only found in my expanded Self
Aspects in infinity's wrap
Of strange disturbances.
Oh... why then challenge so, balance's peace
Why bother old safe dreams with some new
Does the river ever end, is the ocean that near
Am I one of many, or only few?
Chasing traces.
___*___
Ages have I camped in such strange places
Home itself is now
Just a figment of what?
A greater picture
Or just a stamp on an unaddressed envelope?
Waiting for sleep, on a comfortable cot.
Patient for the universe to give up its true addresses
Where Infinity’s chuckles rise into glorious laughter
Knowing well, the envelope has already reached home
Long before.
It’s to me, the We
Please this time, forget me not.
Copyright © Brian Rusch | Year Posted 2024
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Brian Rusch Poem
I was Here last year
Building on my memories…
‘Remember my old hat and way of walking, talking
Playing, and singing the blues…’
___*___
The lands, these lands
How can one not tell a grand story without the Lands
The platform of life activity…
Oh yes, in deeds
Since surrounds play such a wild part.
You seldom have a joy-time resting in a swamp
Or bouncing on a deck, in a raging storm
And who cares for the old aunt on her porch
Rambling on at what the neighbor again is doing.
No, better to climb an easy hill to see a new Sun rise
Or to lay on soft grasses, humming with the birds
Bidding the same Sun as it sets... ‘Adios’.
Or, wander in a quaking Aspen forest
Under cloudless, blue, gentle, breezy skies
In the fall, when the changing colors mesmerize
As if it’s still spring.
Close your Mind and listen...
To the Land’s family sharing
Listen to the singing.
Oh, how life is then eh?
Choose it well.
__*__
For while you while away your day
The cubicle nation holding sway
Someone somewhere, is blessing theirs
Take a least a little time, blessing your own soul.
Acres can be bought and sold
As can candy
But a thousand year-old redwood to sit by
Telling you a strange, ancient story…
Or, an ocean shore to walk barefoot, alone on
Followed by shore birds just traipsing along
With a single sea gull landing, to say…
‘Hey, how’s your day
Mind if I follow?’
Days on Nature’s land… priceless.
___*___
Be ye as rich in your life
The inner lands you can call your own.
Understand what truly profits you as
Luggage, to carry along in your heart of hearts
Especially, for those times you must travel alone.
What is there... then…
You can show to your true friends
After the vacant memories have all passed
And the wise one comes, to ask how you’re truly doing…
Especially if he’s your secret friend, with a special name that’s holy.
Do you, can you… sing him your true song
Will he smile or dance with you, on that land of yours
Or look at you in wonder, and cover his ears.
Now you are talking about unpacking life’s luggage
After all, you can only handle so much.
And some things pack in together so much nicer
And are harder to break.
Learn to wrap the best in comfortable clothes and socks
As they all fit nicely, for any travel.
And wear that jolly hat well.
Copyright © Brian Rusch | Year Posted 2024
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Brian Rusch Poem
In all my artist wanderings
Traveling through these great lands of ours
Places visited or lived in, diverse, memorable
Many messages I received...
As did so many that passed before me
Passing through each wilderness
Learning new steps to take.
___*___
From the lands themselves, such current’s rising
Graced with as much memory as could be held...
Weaving in with the music’s felt in drifting airs…
Did you hear my singing too, joining too
Off in the distances?
___*___
Danced I wildly through in all these places
Connecting currents wherever found, discovered…
Becoming one, uniting elements
Strongly manifesting new impressions around chosen places...
Like volcanoes quiet, smelly, silent cones
Some still holding withheld fires.
And such warm cousins, stifling Desert heats
Driving me to ground to wait out the day…
Can you feel this… laughing with me
Waiting until tomorrow’s return.
___*___
How about even-heated, plain sand places
Near to Ocean’s rocky, and broken, shell-strewn shores
Having their own tunes to teach...
No place here for barefoot wading
Or, even waiting out the tides to rest.
Holding still there, in your chosen place for sittings...
With only bitter biting fleas and seaweeds stinking
Offering sights and feelings for the day.
___*___
Though memory can serve up more irksome places
Try Humid swamps with their dank, smelly waters.
Small islanded wildlands opening
And swiftly closing behind one paddling through.
No trails to follow, just pick any direction
Each offering little argument needed, to leave…
As dusk and darkness settle in early
Ready for new bones to chew on.
___*___
Quick was I always
To run away to higher grounds
When alone, lost in high mountain sloping’s
Airs chilling to the bone
Loose scree feeding fears of falling…
Down and down into waiting holes in the ground.
Silent… cold, wet in caves...
Real rocky Earth connecting again.
___*___
In earlier days, and younger
Where did that great, silence feeling visit before?
Oh yes, on mystic Moon-lit nights
As the large orb passed it’s own time for reflecting...
Listening then to the rising dark...
The Deep of ocean waters.
Sighing within its quiet waves
Can any chasm be as deep and black as mine?
___*___
All this varied life
Much with bitter laughing…
Well, what else could they even say
’Drop in for a visit…?,’ perhaps.
Dare I even think more crazy things as this
Dare I play so wild, in courting stranger dangers?
___*___
For be it known, this Earth has many diverse songs to sing
And not all are pleasant melodies, ears find worth hearing.
What do the crowds say…
Oh, less said or sang by most, better to forget
Learning well, few fully sane men are met
On these sparse empty trails.
So few chasing limits such as these
Through their own many years, then going gray.
___*___
Crazy is... this courting chaos
Finding yet still, many new in such haunted places
Why not, are they fit for naive youth, or wise old men.
Youth for learning true
Elder courting curiosities, unsettling to Soul’s home.
Trying to tie mysterious energies rising together
Merging balanced to be enveloped
By the later sitting-still.
___*___
Enough of this and those
That given in Time and its special places
Wait for waking presence in mind
Sometimes waking old, ancient memories…
Hearing connecting from a deep, quiet within
‘I’ve been here before…’
Ah, for the true artist
Just the place to pursue real art impulses
Where else can the right fools be found?
Can we still dance?
Copyright © Brian Rusch | Year Posted 2025
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Brian Rusch Poem
Can you stack your chunks of memory, like me
In tiered stacks of stories... free to see?
Woven from far time to now, in soft open volumes bound
Waiting for thoughts lost, but Wow... now together found.
Oh, most take me back then, there, into seeing forward times
Where I understand now, what’s yours... what’s mine.
All that can be drank as fresh, versus aged fine wine
Living wild again, renewed here... in such better climes.
No more intense heat, the bitterest of cold
No more living in the fear of... getting old
Battles fought are for less, and better assigned
To other’s intent, far away... from mine.
For now, my choices are more wisely, peaceful made
The yin and yang of things, invested in... and well paid
And love’s all patched, and wrapped in queenly spades
Under new wrapping, yet unopened... so then, better played.
For one thing is sure, well yes, a perfect bet
The best of the best is to come, aye... haven’t seen it yet.
Bring any and all on, before me set
I’ll laugh and cry knowing, already... what I’ll get.
Another life lived, Time, let’s get it on
While the chorus’s not finished, with this... my own Swan Song
For I no longer fear what’s right, or wrong
It all fits into a script, ages old... then dictated long.
That script containing vast Universes, Multi-dimension’s, oh me, oh my
Opened, no more needing a place to run... much less to hide and cry
Free to explore much more, from any other side, and abide
Seeing whole, from parts thought before... so far apart and wide.
___*___
So, if and when we meet again, say us each to other our fond hello’s
No matter how high, or low… we go
Know we now fields are well-chosen, for we both to better sow.
We’re living, that life forgotten, this life... already known.
And secrets shared here and there, now are to re-open
Unwrapping gifts, that here, were never before... then so lively spoken.
So we can laugh, and dance in peace, love well and sing
And see life as it is as balanced, a most splendid... beautiful thing.
For still, lessons lived, we’re here to completely learn
As many as needed, to finish... our turn
Into better trips and higher things, where there to See
Finding who, when, and how we are... what we truly Be.
Be... that’s it, the secret found...
In what all is realized, that’s square, lined, and round
No more to quibble... getting stern and eyebrow’s frowned
Instead smiling so hard, we laugh in falling down.
Into another further Time willed, to pass into again, so funny
Letting go the games we’ve played here, for toys... and money.
All leaving here and there, for others to pick up and squander
As we did ourselves before, remembering our youth here, and back there yonder.
To this Time we knew coming, yes... meant to here get
Under New Moons, and Stars, and even Suns... that will set
Wildly dancing through Times as these, we can now better
See Living out our songs knowing, all this is free, to together gather...
And just… Be.
Copyright © Brian Rusch | Year Posted 2024
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Brian Rusch Poem
Haiku beginning
Green Tara begins singing
Welcome better days…
Morning Sun ends night
Inviting eyes to Nature
Seeking true health’s light
Try sight-see dreaming
What Nature does bring winging
For nurturing Self.
___*___
Filtering out non-truths
Following better curiosity fit
Seeking saner trail-heads
Where Cheshire cats... refuse to sit.
Practicing into a more perfected me
One learning to truly, truly ‘See’.
Seeing, a higher art to learn… to be
Where ‘here’ surrounds one as finally free.
___*___
See the Elements
Working in Nature’s own life
Muses and angels balancing strife.
From the darkest Deeps
Energies of directions
And wildest chaos… stirs
Where darker self
Flounders, as cast aside
By better nature becoming
As he, this other, dark gray in black
Stays there swimming until he sinks
With the deep claiming him
For he is...
Not a very happy fellow
Who likes to be bothered.
___*___
He is like an old, weathered habit
That one has to feed
Less he ramble fierce in chaos
Angry, blind, and powerful
Using remorse as his fuel
Feeding terrors with his angers
To quench unending thirsts through time.
‘What have I done’, he screams
For in the dark swamps
There is so little salvation
Sighing silently, a wisdom seed sprouts…
Then dies, recognizing
‘Here has no home’.
___*___
The Cosmos between...
Holding Space, Place, and Time
Thankfully, is filled with Life’s rhymes
Giving at least places for living dreams to find
Wandering into better times
Though knowing not exactly where.
So, search, and you will find…
Depths of persuasion
Processing good information
There...
Releasing for the better remainder of us
Fluffier rests.
Leaving him supported, curious as I
By all that lies beyond understanding
Bending, toward one’s own true need, not lies
There to practice wise fairness
Selfishness merging with growth,
Within sharper awareness.
___*___
See… practicing kindness
And the five forgivenesses
Grants credibility
To one’s responsibility…
Asking forgiveness, with change
Giving full forgiveness, without remorse
Forgiving self, with grace
Forgiving reluctance to change once
Forgiving twice, within stern resolve...
To embrace change, or admit weakness
Leaving the act of asking forgiveness
Still an issue.
All within selfless duty...
Serving Nature’s management
Where assigned responsibility lies.
___*___
Hear now, planet Earth’s mantra
‘Everything in its season’
Children teasing through the ages...
‘See this, see something new’
For curiosities thrive like morning dew
Constant, ever appearing
Waiting softly for the heat of query,
To offer sweetest secrets in dissipation
Bright sparkling sprinkles.
Like early morning golf balls bouncing through
Without shouted ‘4’ warnings
To prepare the resting quiet carpet
For the light of a busy day.
Scattering misty sprays.. such bouncing gifts to find
Showing fresh green grasses underneath
Heaven surely having spent its restful night here.
___*___
Day passes, Night begins, setting Sun’s reason
Inviting eyes back to Dreaming
Searching for better selves, teaming…
Happy, finding truer homes
Leaving others… in darker places
To forever roam.
Giving right penance
To the progress of men
Green Tara’s partners
Along for the ending ride.
Copyright © Brian Rusch | Year Posted 2024
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Brian Rusch Poem
Softest whispers as I do pass
‘Oh wandering Watcher
Your path has led you here
We wait for the One to come’
‘Are you truly the One to write it?‘
Softer whispering's
‘How will it be true written... in Blood, Fire, or sparkling Water?’
‘How will you write the twelfth verse... to Be’
_______________Maiden I_________________
The world abounds around us
In seeming calamity
Seething with injustices
From sea to polluted sea.
________________Maiden II________________
Disturbed, our Gods forsake us
We look for anything more
And find the Devil laughing
As he closes heaven’s door.
______________Maiden III_______________
What the heck did happen
How did we fall so far
Our educations left us
More ignorant than before.
_____________Maiden IV_______________
As Monied Powers skim the cream
To feed their greedy pits
Where good goes in only crap comes out
What good is there with this?
_____________Maiden V_______________
The answer must be found somewhere
Men solving man’s continuing sins
Or else we all will be shoveled down
A birthing pit... to start again.
___________Maiden VI_______________
As dreams and hopes in scenes of Peace
Shared prosperity turned to mists
Perhaps we sowed the seeds seen sowed
Seeing it through to come to this.
___________Maiden VII______________
For Man does love a tragedy
Too much laughing causes pain
And from far down all can then look up
To mount the Stars again.
___________Maiden VIII_____________
Thinking ourselves victorious
See, no animals do we be
As we rise again, from among the herds
Parading proud for all to see.
___________Maiden IX_____________
As Balance again takes our cue
Freeing Chaos to have its fun
To stun and wreck what’s fair and pure
Feeding chattel to our greedy sons.
___________Maiden X_____________
As life it winds around itself
Meeting Darkness at the end
Thinking Light is just a switch to use
Turn on, proceed again.
___________Maiden XI_____________
Oh, such fools we so surely are
Cursing so... ourselves as sinned
As human life it finally blinks out
Storied potentials forever dimmed.
__________Reply_____________
Stunned at implications
Not me!
I have nothing here to write.
Wait!
Dimmed! Not yet gone… yet
Though what can be done…
I turned around and ran.
The Antlered Man brought The Laughing Master
To the Garden planted
I made refuge in to hide...
And there we spent many days
Planning the last lines ending
Words poetic, rising for hope in the twelfth verse
Achieving something for future hope... in Will.
Abide, bride, cried, deny, fried, guide, lied, pride, ride, side, tied, wide
Or one unborn... still hidden.
Softer whispering's demanded answering's
‘How will it be True written... in Blood, Fire, or sparkling Water?’
‘How will you write the twelfth verse... to Be’
Blood spilled, there be well enough
Not even Fire stems that dark tide
But Water yes, in Life of Man
Sparkles Life to live again.
___________Maiden XII_____________
Oh born She is, to Be, hear ye special Maiden twelve
Speaking words guiding Lighted Truth
Wresting up Love, in Balanced Action's grand
Learned lessons leading wiser youth.
Copyright © Brian Rusch | Year Posted 2024
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Brian Rusch Poem
Thank God, for people of order
That disciplined, hold in people like myself.
We men, who enjoy strange living so…
In such outrageous outposts
Tempting a varied life…
As well as early imprintings so…
Weren’t we told to be better than this challenging?
Why be vibrating on the edge of chaos so...
Seeing few happy women about to help
They who in feeling
Know true what lies in restless artist’s hearts.
___*___
For In many ways these diverse multiple energy’s traded
Are the best of artist’s food
Gourmet meals for the day…
Grinning slightly at yet another close call passing
Blood’s up...
Knowing it feeds special Muses with needed fuels.
Who otherwise would never feed fires so deep within
Jailed instead into bored deafening silences...
So quiet one would think them dead
Instead of so hidden deep.
Reserved, waiting for sparkling lights to come shining their way
Spilling out energy’s fresh to use… ‘Wake up and create!’
___*___
I keep going again through years passing
The energizer of this all, free-choice curiosity, aware…
Of where it strives to be
Wading again throughout our own wild America at will...
Storing future fuels for future work purpose
Carrying lifted, the used soiled lantern of truth
Filtering out chaff and worthless false images
Burning parasites and biters to the ground
We know horizon mirages are just a tease
Better to visit ‘real’ to know
Above all, in truth be true, and stay that way
Is this how it is?
___*___
Does Cool Water ring a bell
With no Dan to call, just a crow cawing…
To mark the way, as morning doves left long ago
Leaving me to crawl alone, to nearest spring.
Unfettered, unchained, crazy at times questioned
Why would, how could artists as I, come to be so untethered
Whatever happened to the fine imprintings in youth given
Thinking you all, we were, we are so well anchored.
___*___
In degrees, communion, employment, right to vote and family
Scattered we and they are and were
Slain all before the wild eyes of chaos.
Looking each in their own mirror
‘Are you happy, fulfilled, truly free?’
Inner-self answers firmly
‘Then what worth was all of that calling itself
In your self, the true, better nature of man?’
Something wrong here
So, in this then, begins the quest
___*___
With too, a fresh lantern lit and hoisted
As sure enough leaving religion, education
Governance, and family to howl...
They, not seeing their own closets
Creating their own monsters
Order, presence, and profits struggling well
To hold such selfish sway.
Watching false praises to those powers that be
Through so many, tedious passing’s of Time.
___*___
Better to throw abandoned justices into dark rooms
Beyond the light of any day, thinking now so well hidden…
War, famine, disease, and sins of all kind
Ever bursting out of bonds, feral, laughing gibberish
Intense, fierce, in more and more velocities
Deliveries of karma, future warning, worse ahead…
Until today, worrying many of forecasted end times
For how else could such encroaching chaos be answered rightly.
___*___
After so many tries, so much fails
As sins of fathers pass on to sons unhindered
To play on, prey on, again using rare blessings given, wasted
Made only into more foul desserts.
While order excuses all to exhaustion
Holding on to its own justifications…
Tethered as it is to long, thought strong, founding habits
Any tortured pathway home only found etched through dirty, bloody fields.
___*___
Long past missing saving grace, that thin ribboned trail
Leading away upwards
Where light lives, and balance reigns supreme
What gain then is that?
No longer needing Chaos understanding
Seeing it then having taken its right place, throughout the All of It
I easily hark back to past dreams and lessor poems
In a new understanding.
___*___
For today... is only today, the same as yesterday.
Or is it...
For dues paid...
From the rim of chaos comes light stirring
Muses waken full, life brightening in diverse places
Secretly rise opening, to fuse in new times ascending.
No secret, answer always there as before
Hiding in plain sight as it is…
And has always been...
Enough people care.
So do we all plod on.
Copyright © Brian Rusch | Year Posted 2025
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Brian Rusch Poem
Oh, find I here as elder in this small place
Some glad respite…
From inside pills
And journeying on to bitter end
With so many joys of past, left trail-side
To sit only in fading memory then
Great entertainments and friends
Allowed temptations, travels
Sparkling departures into new excitements…
Even the most basic of foods and drinks diminished
Into lowest price bid, blandness, and strange resourcing.
Letting mind suffice to hold better recollections, though dimming
Still, having grace winning.
___*___
And here, in this small corner, outside, alone
Humbly, gratefully receiving
Water, fire, winds, and earth connection...
Saying their own small hello’s.
‘Greetings, remember us too, not to be forgotten
Living in unity, here for you, granting your soul reprieve.
Not all in the best of health...’
I do agree…
An old, worn, unlikely small, dry place
Almost enclosed on all sides…
Yet, thankfully outdoors…
Much the same…
As my mind and body here, now seem to be.
___*___
‘Feel deeply’, I’m told...
‘Loose inside connections
Let us here, lovingly remind you of Nature’s vibrations.
Life yet springs the world free
Finding you and our Nature, into I, again together.
Each to it’s same task as before, to need.’
‘Yes, I see!’... I quickly answer in quickening attention
As my mind fuses memory in, opening a forgotten door.
’Yes, bless this place, equal to any forest vast.
Caring little now, how long it’ll last.
With memories brought too, of ocean’s deep
Waves crashing strong…
Winds up to task, blowing energies along.
Within Sun’s heat, stirring water’s pot
Some misting into clouds, far away from here, to drop
On forests and fields, lifeblood rain
Letting Nature amend what was here...
With health returning ten-fold
Into fresh living life, once again.
Even to I, humbly now blessing this spot
No less, no more, than any place in pain.
As we elements all share each other… again...
Though energies owned, fading
Acknowledging age old blessings to all, on our own call.
Can’t live forever.'
___*___
Together, vibrations recall places we’ve roamed
And see here together, gathered once again…
With dreams still to be shared...
Potentials for better future in growing
Singing the joining tunes, each of us well know.
Feel... soft breezes still rise, cool when called
Caressing heated skins
And plants waving hello through seed pods dried thin
As a tiny pond filling, gurgles... ‘Welcome friend’.
All enlightening energies glad received… again
Under this same Sun
Not forgotten.
Space, Place, and Time
All acknowledging most mystic connections
As learned, each to each, past into future
One to the other, investing in…
Joy in peace, serving our own mindful balance.
___*___
I now feel the sleep lying deep within this elder place
Waiting for me also like a very old friend
Nothing to fear, for on nothing it depends.
Silently, and like a blanket, warming
It does not hurt, memories keeping me safe for travel.
Hmm, comes quiet thoughts…
A fitting place to leave these shores, if need be
A Gate to pass one way through… this yes, Heaven’s door.
For the time is close
Tired, I feel it step softly near.
___*___
‘There is no true pain’, It whispers
‘There is no fear’.
“I will cry not out loud”, I answer, shedding no tear
The other side... becoming clear.
Secrets unfold, as know I, this task near done
A long life lived, lessons won
And I carry... with me memories of everyone
As well as energies connecting...
To wake anew, under a purer White Sun.
___*___
Within wisdom’s and understanding’s learned
Here past into there’s future, fusing into one whole
Completion...
Such an easy gate to pass.
In deep humility sharing softest tears
I give thanks singing…
And return back to elder work.
Perhaps tomorrow.
Copyright © Brian Rusch | Year Posted 2024
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Brian Rusch Poem
Is this that most uncertain day
When new thoughts rising
Demand their say
Breaking with past ways thought secure
That like broken icebergs, face warming waters pure
Met in life changed, as sons and daughters
And other melted sirens of various kinds.
Water is water, so it is all singing say
So why not merge with us today
For Sun’s hot, and rousing us to fly
Into forming clouds that fill the sky
Or stay firm as ice you can see in heading south
To butt into brothers like yourself
To in the end make full southern amends
By becoming ice-lands once again.
So when you’re ground and melted down
And all can see, what in the past you’ve found
Will they believe you, from far north or south
Or think stranger meltings fill their mouth
Or just murmur, smile, and shake their head
And not give a lick for what’s been said
Since ice is ice, whether north or south
Or in a drink heading for your mouth
No matter where your ice journey led...
Instead of rain, it’s just piss instead.
Copyright © Brian Rusch | Year Posted 2024
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