Toit Poems | Examples


Premium MemberHoity Toit Hill

Because of my farting
I'm stuck in one room
In my mansion on Hoity-Toit Hill
The force of the gas
Expelled from my ass
Propels me along, “What a thrill!”

As my butt cheeks expand
I aim straight ahead
With a helmut secured to my bean-o
I land with a thud
Don't worry, no blood
Silliest scene you've ever seen-o

I picks meself up
Wipes the sweat from my brow
In the white porcelain bowl I deposit
But after I'm done
Unloading a ton
I've got no more farts in the closet

So I sit for a while
For an hour or so
Till I build up my internal gases
After a few sonic booms
I return to my room
But I sadly broke the lens in my glasses

© Jack Ellison 2014
Categories: toit, humorous,
Form: Quatrain

Premium MemberOh Flip!! He Spilled It!

Sexy Dr. du Toit
was a man I loved to avoid
I caught the fever, he had the reliever
instead of giving me the injection, it gushed in his direction…







*The doctor was suppose 
to give me an injection on my butt,
but most of it ended up on his clothes.. 
Must have been my attire,  if I was not so sick that day, I would have thought it was hilarious*
Categories: toit, funnyme,
Form: Clerihew


Bp Will Show No Shame: Written For Paula Swanson

It's not my fault.
The oil just wants out!
It's no ones fault
Things happen, sludge is in the current.

I'm not to blame,
Really, I don't know!
Yacht racing brings fame
So I had to go!

You have no proof!
Who can say, who done it?
So who should fix the leaking "roof"?
BP will get around toit!

I will show no shame
I am not to blame!
That's how I roll this game!
My fifteen minutes of fame.

For Paula's contest--had to get on BP in the process!!
Categories: toit, satire
Form: Quatrain
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