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Faded

I’m stuttering on this facile analogy      
Like I’m tripping on dubious morality
I’m lisping on my plain quizzicality 
Like I’m limping on roads to tonality
I’m damaged.
A marred good with no return policy

I’ve bled alone to one too many fights
I’ve slept wide awake one too many nights
I’ve stared into oblivion one too many sights 
I’ve chosen death to one too many plights 
Save me,
I’ve sullied too many lives
                                                                                                   
I’ll lie to your face again
I’ll smile with no grief again
I’ll die to your words again
I’ll fly with no wings again
Leave me be.
I’ll dry your ocean eyes again  

I’d wish my life color
I’d vie a stolen muller
I’d carve my own collar
I’d slit my neck in choler
You’d tempt me,
I’d fade in my own luster 

It’s just that,
It’s hard to breathe these days
It’s sad that,
‘Languish’ is my ultimatum (huh), what a cliché’
And it’s worse that
I’m the cause of my own decay.

Copyright © Hiba Junaid

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Book: Reflection on the Important Things