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Mind of Mine
I dread closing my eyes
Because when I do,
The sane, real world around me dissolves
Replaced instead by an inner monster
Rising up from the deep dark depths of my mind
I make it sound like I am possessed by a devil
But indeed my mind isn't short of one
Filling me up with raucous laughter
In the most inappropriate of situations
Threatening to tear down the social image of myself
That i have oh so carefully created
So i bow my head down
In the middle of an ongoing fight or funeral
In solemn silence through eyes of an onlooker
While I am terribly preoccupied waging a war with mind for control : over myself
Not so usually do i win this war of thoughts
My mind a more powerful force than i could reckon
Before i get interrupted by reality
And then this war continues again
In the middle of the night
When my eyes won't close
My mind haunts with memories of the past
Unconquerable dreams of the future
Poking the carcasses of long dead conversations
Rupturing my delicate, unhealed wounds
With knives made of guilt, shame and fear
So on so forth this saga goes on
Until I am left with a battered, ravaged body.
Copyright ©
Vedangee Kadam
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