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How unappealing the missus went bananas

How unappealing... the missus went bananas
courtesy hurling mandarin oranges.

Yes quite juvenile
unladylike childlike behaviour,
mine wife oft times doth display,
I do not deplore

yours truly reckons
tis futile effort causing furore
aye attest bull
in china shop incorrigible hardcore
exhibited by spouse

out of bounds antics bon jour
earlier within marriage
shenanigans twas the stuff
back in the day
sparking altercations, haint no lore

regarding wedded bliss
muddle aged doozy storied
married couple expressing
mutual love nevermore

did deux disparate
birds of a feather flock together
espousing total mortal kombat
(with looming fruity weapon
of mass destruction

living below poverty dirt poor
surviving (barely) hand to mouth
unable to afford
top of line high grade

clean atomic bombs rapport
re: ruining our reputation
as hoity toity main liners
portraying child's play
conflicts in East/West Timor

almost annihilating each other
i.e. zee Harris family
plus well nigh turning
planet Earth into vapour.

Sober realization of brinksmanship
brought now auld
geezers (defanged & harmless)
flinging foodstuffs cold

and/or frozen leftovers
(carbon dated), petrified extolled
as delicacy among Neanderthals,
who would value and

cherish fruit lobbed as
love's labour's lost more precious
(as a physical expression of affection)
more so than fine spun gold
thee rented man cave serves

atavistic trait hard rock cafe
functions as pleasant reminder,
where one percent genetic
stock originated (think noggin
rock hard iron maiden mold).

Backtrack to years spanning 2000-2010
wen furious red hot poker rage
twas unmanageable when living
under duress within Penn Valley

even tranquilizers could not assuage
harkening back when yours truly
under threat courtesy battle ax
and her henchwomen,

which matriarch took immediate dislike,
née rabid (foaming
at the mouth loathing)
towards yours truly

them days outright state
of undeclared warfare
found fury within me
exceeding the wrath of Kong!

Thank dog, I mellowed since then
gratuity prescription medication.

Copyright © matthew harris