Turning the maxim familiarity breeds contempt on it's head
Turning the maxim familiarity breeds contempt on it's head...
not just in time for Valentine's Day
but the remaining days of our lives
as the world turns
on all our children
the young and restless
now grown to womanhood
After being married
for nearly three and a half score years,
(our eldest daughter,
will celebrate her twenty ninth birthday
December 22, 2025,
hence you dear reader do the basic math),
I must admit a dynamic between me
and the missus, a gal who ofttimes claims
without a shadow of a doubt,
when she first set eyes upon yours truly -
a veritable stranger to her,
whose lips of mine
she hankered to plant a smooch,
I would have gladly welcomed
an unexpected pleasant kiss met,
(this then handsome late twenty/early
thirty something singular male
deeply engrossed with his nose in a book
while sitting on the steps
outside of Summit Presbyterian Church
located at 6757 Greene Street,
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania 19119),
knew now confessed courtesy female intuition
that instant karma
would foretell wedding bells
(scaring the bejesus out of me
at the prospect of spending
living years with spunky future bride )
despite countless ugly falling out scenarios,
especially sparked red hot poker rage,
when I adamantly blurted out
an ambition to date other women
canoodling with fecund enthralling gamines
just the mere thought of intercourse
drove pepe le pew into auto erotic mode
flights of fancy, which activated
an immediate and instantaneous erection,
(albeit puny poor excuse for a pulsating prick),
automatically triggering libidinal urge
seething with hormonal secretion),
and subsequent premature ejaculation
said utterances of mine
to play the field of whet dreams
witnessed explosive verbal altercations
threatening violent outcome,
but who came to the rescue,
but none other than one
hulking hero named Frank Glass,
(he moved pianos for a living,
which explained outsize Popeye arm muscles),
he unwittingly served as a guiding light
keeping at bay dark shadows
creeping closer from the edge of night
intervened and smothered
potential Jerry Springer drama,
whereat the four foot eleven inch woman,
would still not accept "no" as an answer
no matter angry laced expletives
hurled like rocket propelled grenades
out the mouth of one ordinarily docile dude
undoubtedly kindled atrocious, contentious,
ferocious, jocoserious, and odious outbursts
heard all the way clear across to Compton
even thugs from the Crips and Bloods
took pause between their turf battles
to admire pugilistic suckerpunches
charging the air supply with crackling electricity.
Between stints of contra dancing
we exchanged glaring looks that could kill,
and afterward while walking
on opposite sides of the street
trudging to our respective vehicles
simultaneously exchanging nasty black barbs
lobbed off our respective tongues
each against the other
with heightened vindictiveness
cutting down to size
the person eventually
grudgingly accepted as my girlfriend
introduced and accepted with tepid response
from members of the Harris family,
likewise future groom
received icy cold unwelcome reception from
Zison patriarch and matriarch,
nevertheless in fits and starts
companionability fostered unspoken detente
eventually encouraging affectionate rapport
flavoring more hospitable tête-à-tête
slowly but surely inducing
overt unbridled yearning
(analogous blinding concupiscence)
tripped love making wire,
whereat most every opportunity
found us consorting,
ginning healthy interactions
allowing, enabling, and providing
a natural segue bedding down together day or night,
whether at 324 Level Road
or 1148 Greentree Lane
living together feigning wedded bliss
absent the minor issue of birth control,
unbeknownst to us earning kudos
from The Roman Catholic church,
which forbids contraceptive use
because it represents a sin against nature,
and premarital sex as well,
thus upon discovering visa vis
blithely engaging in unprotected sex
lo and behold bitta bing bitta band
begetting the future mother
of our eldest offspring
unwittingly helped definitive decision
to be made and marriage invitations
got made and handed out
to a select small number of people
exchanging holy matrimony vows
courtesy justice of the peace Henry J. Schireson,
who officiated legal proceedings,
a Pennsylvania magisterial district judge
for Montgomery County Magisterial District,
which low key event
occurred July twenty fifth nineteen ninety six.
Copyright ©
Matthew Harris
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