And I Exhaled
I was so close to the sun,
Tantalizing; ethereal-
Warm rays rolling over my skin before-
Sinking deep,
A parasite rooting itself into my neck,
Gentle caresses-
Strangling-
Choking-.
Churning-,
Inching closer-
And it stopped.
I felt air again,
But my lungs had grown so used to the feeling-
I gasped and grasped for air to receive so little in return;
A fated reminder.
My neck; freed,
Yet I strained for air-,
I learnt.
To wrap my hands around my neck-
To twist it (Just how he did)-
To breathe in,
And out,
And in,
And out.
And when I walked,
I stumbled; so far from the chain-
The leash,
I stumbled.
I saw it everywhere.
I saw it in how the leaves that were hoisted up by the wind (Which I craved dearly)-
Flew,
Being carried away by the gust-
Just how those warm rays had,
Rolled, rolled down my skin-,
But the leaves drifted without worry; careless.
I saw it in people holding hands-
Hands that would surely grip, claw and seize-
To sink deep- deep- and deeper still into that dripping, tensed palm-,
Fingers that would tighten around;
Nails to rip and to tear;
A forefinger and thumb,
To lift you so high;
Only to fall-
Fall-
Fall.
But soon my hands grew tired of grasping my neck,
And my legs grew bruised from crawling.
I no longer felt the air-,
Climbing through a crushed windpipe,
But instead a,
Whirlwind.
In and out-
I breathed in and out-.
In that crowded mall-,
People walked past; oblivious-
To the clean air-,
In and out-,
I breathed in and out in that crowded mall.
I stood, staring into my palms-
No longer stained with my sweat-
And I breathed.
Copyright ©
Toby Adams
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